METAPHYSICS & VOTING RIGHTS

“We reap what we sow”

“And I will show wonders in the heavens and in the earth, blood, and fire, and pillars of smoke. The sun shall be turned into darkness, and the moon into blood, before the great and terrible day of the Lord come.” Bible Book of Joel, Chapter 3:3-4

As a participant in and observer of humanity’s insanity for over ¾ Century, I’m here to share my point of view of what has happened, is happening, and will happen through social, political, personal, and metaphysical lenses and constructs. View on the largest screen possible. The subtlety is in my artwork. Take what works. Leave what doesn’t.

I’m focusing my attention on one rare celestial event. Super Blue Blood Moons occur when a full lunar eclipse, super-moon, and blue moon all happen at the same time. The alchemy between Earth’s atmosphere and sunlight create the Blood-like hue. About 25 percent of all full moons are super-moons. Only 3 percent of full moons are blue moons. The time between super blue moons is irregular. It can be as much as 20 years, in general, 10 years is average. The next super blue moons will occur in January and March of 2037. The Super Blue Blood Moon of 1866 symbolized the end of Slavery. That’s also when seeds of MAGA were sown. Social viruses, corporate greed, and political trolls infected humanity with illusion, delusion, fear, hate, and hopelessness.

“The lips of wisdom are closed, except to the ears of understanding” Hermes

Tens of millions of people read their horoscopes daily in newspapers and magazines without realizing the true value of astrology. Astrology is an ancient wisdom, science, and art that examines relationships between cycles of celestial bodies and life on earth. Every moment in time and space has an exclusive signature. Horoscopes are unique maps of positions of planets in the heavens at specific times and places. Astronomical patterns symbolize life’s experiences and synchronize with human personality patterns. Presidents, Emperors, Kings, Dictators, Philosophers, Mystics, and Scholars have used astrology (and still do) to observe, make sense of, manage, and influence world events.

Astrology embodies Hermes law of Polarity, “As Above, So Below”. Our night sky gives context to our lives by revealing archetypal patterns, embodying cycles, picking timing, habits, and understanding behavior and mass mindset in a generational context. Astrology symbolizes past, present, and future as reflected in planetary transits, progressions, and natal relationships with symbolic mothers, fathers, brothers, sisters, cousins (asteroids), and ancestral stars through signs, aspects, and houses. Western humanity shares the same old dysfunctional genes as our Greek and Roman ancestors. Our permutations, combinations, possibilities, and probabilities are infinite.

Let’s look at politics through the lens of astrology. If hindsight is 20/20 and history does repeat itself, why not choose to embrace and manifest the most positive attributes of our symbolism? George W Bush, Bill Clinton, and Donald Trump all share Gemini North Nodes (December 24 1945 ~ August 11 1947). Anyone born August 6 1964, February 21 1966 (60–62), or March 15 1983 ~ Nov 1 1984 (40–41), shares that same karma. Gemini north node is an invitation and responsibility to join society to share higher consciousness and lend humanity a helping hand so we can all exercise higher mind.

It’s easy to see how Bill Clinton and George Bush screwed up. Bill (Leo), and George (Leo rising) have epic egos and corresponding hubris. George was born with too much unearned power and entitlement. Bill earned his reward, but learned humility the hard way through public embarrassment and shame. Innately gifted, smart, handsome, and charismatic, Bill was tempted by his wounded ego and seduced by false pride. Rest assured, Hillary kicked his sorry butt.

Donald Trump (Leo rising) has brought higher consciousness to humanity through the back trap door. Many people have become politically proactive due to Donald’s horrible behavior and terrible example as a role model. A closeted loser inflicted more than his fair share of damage on humanity. How many gilded towers, glitzy gambling casinos, golden pedestals, graven images, beauty queens, pageants, shark tanks, apprentices, and celebrity idols do we need? Why do so many MAGA followers wear red caps and golden sneakers? Have they purchased one way tickets to Trumplandia?

The dark side of the force is alive and well. An Evil Emperor rules while Darth Vader controls the Evil Empire. Yoda, Jedi knights, Luke Skywalker, and all heroes and heroines must search to find a quest, choose what’s right, and act accordingly.

Barack Obama’s Sun, Mercury, Uranus, and North Node are in Leo. Barack, a Hero, was not entitled. He worked, grew, flourished, blossomed, earned humility early, and sacrificed freedom to be present when many people needed a helping hand. Barack Obama is a real person, loves his family and friends, and cares about everyone else.


Genes of past solar eclipses are seeds for future eclipses. Solar and lunar eclipses gave us President Trump who gave us permission to be our worst, short-sighted, petty selves, overflowing with secret prejudices, private perversions, pervasive fear, and horrible hatred that divides and corrupts everyone and everything. Pandemic passivity, epidemic complacency, and persistent procrastination prevent positive thinking and rob personal and collective agency. Choice matters. As does everyone and everything else.

Everyone is talking about the 14th amendment these days. The Fourteenth Amendment is a direct result of our Civil War. Both proponents and opponents of Donald Trump are attempting to redefine the wording of Section 3, hoping that a reasonable interpretation of the Law either qualifies or disqualifies Donald from running for President due to his insurrectionist rhetoric and ongoing increasingly horrible behavior. A function of the 14th amendment is social and political management. That’s not its purpose.

Fourteenth Amendment

All persons born or naturalized in the United States, and subject to the jurisdiction thereof, are citizens of the United States and of the states wherein they reside. No State shall make or enforce any law which shall abridge the privileges or immunities of citizens of the United States; nor shall any State deprive any person of life, liberty, or property, without due process of law; nor deny to any person within its jurisdiction the equal protection of the laws.

In 1866, the Party of Lincoln attempted to govern through equity, equality, and equanimity. Reconstruction became law. That law is still nebulous, abused, wrapped in false pride, shrouded in secrecy, disguised in deceit, and enveloped in darkness for nearly two centuries. It’s time to face the truth of who and what we’ve become.

MASTA-DON’s KAKISTOCRACY

Government by the least suitable or competent citizens of a State

“A concerted, extremely well-funded crusade is underway among elements of the MAGA party, who gleefully desecrate the ideas of its founders, effectively eroding and destroying the vital essences of Reconstruction’s greatest achievement—birthright citizenship and equality before the law.” The Atlantic ~ 10 / 2018

The same celestial genes that propelled Donald Trump into power in 2016 also created the state of Israel in January of 1948. Doomed from the get-go, the Jewish People were given a barren, arid, but holy slice of desert surrounded by masses of Arabs who hated their guts historically, socially, and religiously. Paths of permissions and denials lead to palaces of persecution, victimization, and extinction. Pogroms unified the Jewish Race in the past. The rest of the world is wondering whether the victims have become the persecutors. Can you picture Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu below?

Blood of past Super Blood Wolf Moons is DNA for present and future moons. Super Lunar Eclipse brings more than exotic auras around full moons. January 2018 Super Blue Blood Moon impelled a government shutdown as Republicans failed to reach agreement on a bill that would keep federal agencies funded. January 21, 2019, May 26, 2021, and January 6, 2021 total lunar eclipses had predictable results. Donald Trump refused to concede an election while inciting an insurrection.

Despite Trump’s pleas and denials, Joe Biden was President, inaugurated January 20, 2021. Concern has been expressed over Biden’s age. An elder statesman who dedicated his life to politics is trying to make a positive difference for humanity. We should support, nourish, and practice Joe’s best intentions.

What has happened? Healthcare became our #1 priority. Covid 19 reformed political and social landscapes. China decoupled from the West. Too many wildfires and tropical storms reminded us how humans are affecting climate change. The killing of George Floyd highlighted hypocrisy in black human rights issues. Televising violent incidents breathed new life into Black Lives Matter Movements and caused protests over racial violence across our country. The United Arab Emirates (UAE) recognized Israel in return for Israel’s pledge to forgo annexing territory in the West Bank. The Abraham Accords were signed. Oil production and prices plummeted due to Covid 19 repressing demand. Our relationship with Iran worsened. Belarus was captured by a dictator who discounted everyone’s votes. Donald Trump was acquitted of impeachment charges.

LAW of HUBRIS

TRUMP will Unravel ~ MAGA will Crumble ~ JUSTICE will Prevail.

WAKE UP AND WHIFF THE WEIRDNESS

Republicans feign competence. Selfishly, heartlessly, ignorantly, and for personal gain, they create and enforce unfair partisan laws, rules, regulations, codes, and doctrines over obedient, organized, apathetic, and clueless flocks of followers. As they loot our personal and collective coffers, they squander our precious natural resources, and create stagnant swamps of toxic waste that ooze from our faucets, orifices and pores, into streams, rivers, and oceans of physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual worlds. Meanwhile, MAGA members angrily threaten non-believers with retribution. ‘Resistance is futile’.

Earth, water, and sky are metaphors for our bodies, feelings, and thinking. We must examine our physical, mental, emotional, ideological, philosophical, and psychological footprints. Our Souls and the Spirit of our planet are infected with pervasive doubt and fear that needs to be exorcised and reborn through acts of love, faith, and hope.

EXPELLIARMUS”

DONALDEMORT ~ DEMENTORS ~ Greta

Democrats feign incompetence. ‘Meaning well’, they meander clueless, aimless, and mindlessly across bleak and barren wastelands, begging for handouts, seeking aid, and frantically prodding feckless followers toward endless mazes of filling out more surveys, forms, petitions, and final requests for money disguised in guilt, shame, blame, urgency, and panic. Democrats throw $$$ at distressing symptoms without addressing root causes. Mesmerizing us with synthesized voices and targeting us with algorithmic bots is not a healthy direction for Democracy. Democracy is personal.

Sacred cows, golden calves, best of intentions, and unwitting, insensitive, naive, and cruel behaviors must be sacrificed on the altars of truth, faith, and love. Right to Life vs Right to Choose is Religion vs Politics. Let’s separate Religion from Politics, retire the old stale white bread in charge of Patriarchy and give Matriarchy a fresh and fertile chance at managing humanity.

We need to redefine self, family, friends, home, and community. There are too many unwanted, unhealthy, and unhappy people who don’t know the difference between unconditional love, tough love, and no love. How white, black, and gray are we? are you? am I?

WHETHER REPORT

Common sense without good sense is nonsense. Pious philosophies, pointless partisan political paradigms, and pestilential pecuniary practices pollute higher purpose and poison our psyches. Faulty families feast frenziedly on flawed feelings, vague values, and toxic thinking, copiously spiced with needless fear, desperation, and hatred. As we compartmentalize, rationalize, and analyze our insane ideologies and beliefs, we sacrifice our dignity, integrity, nobility, and virtue on the altars of nonsense.

Vengeance is not a solution to violence. Fear, hatred, and rage grow exponentially. When frantic, fearful, fateful shit happens, we focus on insane ideas like “Apocalypse” or “Armageddon”. Choosing pathological social and political ideologies and embracing hypocritical religious fundamentalist doctrine darkly and magically transforms our blackest most fatalistic beliefs into self-fulfilling prophecies. Extinction is nearing.

Remember, it’s not what you do, but what you get away with that matters!

A full wolf moon manifested on January 25, 2024. Dark storm clouds continue to gather as ravenous wolves devour innocent, gullible, and naive soon-to-be-voters who cower fearfully until the right hero gives them back their power and convinces them to vote for good. As humanity races frantically, desperately, and simultaneously toward and away from bad shit happening, worse shit happens. Wolf embodies intuition, cunning, and self-reflection. Leo inspires courage, strength, and leadership. Why choose darkness?

What is our Cosmos telling us? Our world is everyone’s oasis, stage, and toilet by degree. We’re all producers, directors, actors, and observers. We must examine our rigid headsets and create a revolution that transforms our apathetic, untruthful, and fearful thoughts and actions into choosing, embracing, and nourishing healthy and happy mindsets.

Don’t expect to be saved by partisan politicians. It’s our responsibility to make our full lunar eclipses more meaningful or we’ll still be putting up with the same old bullshit hundreds of years from now. How can we become more self-aware? Can we actually make healthy choices and take healthy actions? Will we finally choose good health for ourselves, each other, and our planet? Is it too late?

Evil emperors weave wardrobes of secrecy, darkness, and deceit. Bullshit trickles down. Partisan politicians, pathological prosecutors, and punishing persecutors poison our psyches. We must shift our malignant spiritual and philosophical paradigms from surviving in a scary and fearful world to thriving on a healthier and happier planet.

Haves will never willingly give their freedom or power away. Nor should they if they use their freedom, power, and desire to help the rest of us to have healthier lives, more meaningful experiences, realistic expectations, better relationships, more sustainable environments, healthier histories, realized hopes, and fulfilled dreams. Exercising good sense and acting with courage, strength, dignity, wisdom, and grace ensure healthy intentions, thoughts, feelings, and actions have healthy consequences. When love and respect rule, the rest is detail. Nothing makes better sense. Giving is God’s work.

HAVES must give as much as they can, fully, consciously, and generously to any and all valuable causes that are helpful to humanity and the ongoing health of our planet. Taxes are necessary. All money and all resources are here to nourish everyone and everything. Government is here to help us, not themselves, and their wealthy patrons.

Our good health and health of our world depends on our ability to share healthy thoughts and loving feelings. We can no longer substitute money for values, religion for spirituality, and collective illusion and delusion for reality. As humanity meanders hopelessly through time, space, and eternity, a Messiah awaits in a Mirror.

My fearless prediction. Our next Blue (Democracy) Moon occurs August 19, 2024. Waves of previous non-voters will choose to vote Blue. After the November election, a Democratic President, House, and Senate will transform politics. Every vote will count. Citizen’s United will be seen for what it is and dealt with. The Electoral College will become extinct. The Supreme Court will become balanced. Food will be healthier. Guns will become more sensibly managed and controlled. Our planet will begin to heal. We’ll each be more conscious of our part in being a member of our world.

Reflect~ VOTE BLUE!

The rest of this artwork was originally woven into the fabric of what you’ve already read. A writer friend suggested I eliminate my most vitriolic dark parody from my content as she felt it was distracting and interfering with my message. I’ve separated it. My ideas and artwork parody other writer’s and artist’s ideas and artwork. They’re my muses. I’ve left their names when there. Forgive and enjoy my alterations, alliterations, and aberrations.

Profit vs Prophet

A spiritually bankrupt society worships idols from amateur hours and applauds scripted survivors. Masses of meek minds, mesmerized by meaningless media, are captivated by TV courtroom melodramas. Critical and judgmental of the pettiest of behaviors, our psyches are ruled by malignant narcissists, warped exhibitionists, and pious perverts who perniciously parade their sleaziest selves before a desperate and depraved public. WINNERS and losers live in a world of HAVES with MORE, & have-nots with less than ever

This tiny speck in time and space we call earth, and our collective psyche are immune deficient. We preach love and sympathy and practice hate and fear. Appalling apparent apathy produces pandemic pathological paradigms. We fixate on sex, death, violence, and disease while fear, greed, mistrust, and shortsightedness rule our personal and collective psyche. Mistaking ‘no love’ for ‘tough love’ is so easy because not enough healthy role models are helping us to see ourselves and others clearly.

We prostrate ourselves before self-appointed emperors on polished brass plated tin pedestals. We patronize political prostitutes, follow fanatical terrorists, admire terrible tyrants, and worship god-fearing fundamentalists. We’re fascinated by werewolves, fake vampires, and crazed zombies, while real werewolves, vampires, and zombies suck our vital essences, grab our pussies, control our personal choices, and silence our voices.

Must we lose what we have to value what we had?

Is it possible to remain sane in an insane world?

Evil acts are symptoms. Evil intents are causes. Wealth and power are conjoined twins. Why do we believe we’re better than others? Why harm others when we can help them? All humans can assume responsibility for everyone’s good health by knowing, honoring, and loving ourselves and practicing good intentions for everyone and everything else.

Donald Trump is a Gemini with Leo rising. His Leo hands embody the most negative attributes of Leo’s behavioral patterns that include being self-centered, self-indulgent, superficial, ostentatious, egotistical, ruthless, greedy, bossy, seductive, and a lousy role model. What happened to Donald’s humanity? It’s mind boggling to witness how a person can have so much externally and be so spiritually bankrupt at the same time.

Mercury is the court jester who reveals folly though humor. Mercury’s dark side is the trickster, con-artist, and pickpocket. Donald Trump’s north node in Gemini conjunct his Sun Uranus in Gemini, natal Mercury is square Neptune, and his corresponding curved pinkie fingers confirm Donald’s pathological dishonesty. His head and life lines intertwined at their beginnings symbolize Donnie’s aloof and defiant behavior. He craves our approval and cares about what we think of him, though he acts like he doesn’t. He certainly doesn’t care about us. Donald’s day of reckoning is coming. Hubris has taken down every despot in history and will take down Donald when the horrible things that he has done are no longer acceptable because they violate basic healthy human standards and requirements. Donald will become extinct.

Soon to be no longer useful idiot

Author’s note: many people have curved pinkie fingers. They are not pathological liars. A majority of people with curved pinkies are trying to avoid confrontation. They’re peace makers because they learned as children to ‘act nice’ and ‘make the peace’. If you’re ‘too nice’, ‘please too much’, or ‘can’t say no’ you’ve likely chosen safe over satisfying. Do you have a long strong index finger and curved pinkie? You give your power away.

HOW I LOST MY SANITY ~ Episode 8

I was on my way out of public service, nearly impossible to fire, and angrier and more defiant than ever. I pondered what progress I could actually achieve given my circumstances. What positive changes could happen before I was forced to abandon the quest part of my job? I decided to create artwork for the patient newspaper under the pseudonym, ‘M’. I believed it was my chance to reach any and all real thinkers.

It’s sobering to try to make any sense out of nonsense. I decided good sense would rule. I believed most people who took the time to read would get it. Too many had learned in the hardest ways that everything is normal until it’s not. If normal and abnormal are opposites of the same basic substance with black and white extremes, what shades of gray does normal end and abnormal begin? How do we know when we’re not normal or on our way to not normal?

Is it possible to be sane in an insane world? I proceed slowly toward a best possible outcome, despite persistent challenges, gigantic obstacles, and dogged resistance to change. Making artwork is my process of balancing my sanity with all insanity. I’ve modified writing and artwork from Summer of 2015 to help reflect current events in the here and now. There’s no time and place like the present to observe the past, see the present, and preview the future. My ideals and ideas are guided by my conscience, logic, practical thinking, undying faith, and open channels to good sense. Here is my contribution to the patient newspaper.

There’s way too much craziness around here. Everyone is angry, frustrated, and depressed most of the time. There are two types of captives here, full-time and part-time. Full-time are patients and are required by law to be here. Part-time are staff who are underpaid to work within a very limiting and confining structure. At the end of the day, they go home. An incredible amount of time and energy is spent silently suffering under bleak florescent lighting, bland colors, bad air flow, and rigid bureaucratic leadership. Who says misery doesn’t love company?

Complaining and blaming our problems and circumstances on the system and each other hasn’t worked, isn’t working, and isn’t going to work. How much of our craziness is choice? How much is out of our control? Using logic and psychology are important for preparing and maintaining our good health, clear thinking, real feelings, and free spirits.

Many of us are potentially generous and productive people. There’s lots of capability and talent among us. We could all be leading happier and more productive lives. Is it possible to re-stage, rewrite, and redirect your script while re-imagining your roles, directors, actors, and audiences for a different outcome? Can you envision being your own author and guide for your story?

What can we do? We can stop complaining. We can acknowledge that we’re here and now. We can accept (for the time being) what we’re unable or don’t want to change. We can make positive decisions and commitments to improving the quality of our daily experience. We can encourage one another to grow. We can cultivate our unique talents and abilities. We can do extra. We’re a team of uniquely diverse players. Our powerful opponents are bureaucracy, bad habits, time, and greed. Powerful adversaries prevent us from being real with ourselves and each other. We can all be winners by degree. It’s up to each and every.

The purpose of this creation is to transmute inhumanity into humanity based on good sense. It’s about becoming more aware of ourselves and what’s around us. We can change our mindsets and become healthier. We can all live more meaningful lives on a healthier planet and world. All lives and that planet are very much at risk at the moment.

GREENING OF THE PSYCHE

Psychic Pollution is Mother of All Pollution. Psychic Pollution occurs when negative ideologies, philosophies, and beliefs are planted, sprout, proliferate, flourish, and blossom into horrible social paradigms. Psychic Pollution is the result of creating, cultivating, and collecting, but not properly disposing of Psychic Garbage. Fear, ignorance, and apathy are contagious diseases that pollute our bodies, psyches, souls, and world. Our bad habits and horrible behaviors interfere with our good health and happiness and the good health and wellness of our world.

Too much hate is a path to more fear, terror, and misery for all. We must let go of fear, acknowledge our differences, face ourselves, exorcise our demons, and build bridges of humility, compassion, wisdom, and grace instead of walls of fear, anger, rage, and hatred.

The human race has become a race against bad shit happening. One example of how fear, ignorance, and apathy operate is when a person who has been elected to have the most power to change the world tells the world he is unable to sign an international climate treaty to sustain the world. He offers vengeance as a solution to violence without proposing a helpful and constructive vision which leaves people feeling hopeful about their future. Choosing Money over Morality and Religion over Spirituality has catapulted the human psyche into darkness. The Devil is hard at work attracting and feeding falsehoods to Fundamentalists and Extremists who desperately cling to Religion and Money while the rest of us lose Faith in Equity, Equality, Ethics, Virtue, and Grace.

“Wake up and smell the Psychic Garbage”

Most of us fear Cancer and Climate Change. Meanwhile, our air, lungs, water, blood, bodies, cities, towns, soils, souls, planet, and inner and outer worlds are in deadly peril. Even without constant human warfare, we consume massive amounts of highly toxic chemicals every day in our wars with insects, rodents, weeds, dirt, stains, odors, germs, bacteria, pathogens, and many other potential invisible enemies. The chemicals that heat and cool us, produce and power our transportation, process, color, flavor, and preserve our foods, provide us with even more useful and useless stuff, and enable us to communicate on a grand scale are poisoning us. How bright white, squeaky clean, and bacteria free must we be?

Fossil fuels are finite. Roads are overcrowded. As we analyze, rationalize, and compartmentalize our worst behaviors, our climate worsens. We eat, drink, breathe, wash, brush, and apply Cancer-causing chemicals to skin, digestive, circulatory, and respiratory systems, spirits, choices, actions, planet, and world. Where’s good sense?

Research has proven that thoughts and feelings cause chemical changes in our bodies and physical changes in our world around us. Doctors and psychologists link causes and cures of physical ailments with mental states. Our health and the health of our world is a direct result of the thoughts and feelings we embody, embrace, encourage, and enhance.

Private and public sources of energy, food, housing, health care, transportation, communications, raw materials, manufacturing, and religion must be responsible for maintaining and upgrading both our physical and social infrastructures for our people, planet, and world. Transmuting inhumanity’s selfish intentions through merging all with ALL is crucial to healing our world.

Screening ourselves from our sun has become a way of life. Apparel, cosmetics, and pharmaceutical industries create new chemicals to protect us from the consequences of past, present, and future chemicals. Human healthcare industries boom as a human race continues to copulate, contract fresh viruses, develop cancers, discover new immune deficiencies, and encounter myriad environmental, food, and health challenges. Demand for doctors, nurses, hospitals, researchers, and health care professionals is skyrocketing. Mental health workers are crucial. Religious institutions are enjoying a revival as so many lost souls seek answers. Environmental opportunities are popping up everywhere. Greenwashing is popular. It’s on its way to its destiny and final resting place ~ KARMA.

Another growth industry is funerals. I’ve got an idea that can save humanity lots of time, space, and money. Here it is for free. Stack people vertically in tubes instead of burying them horizontally in plots. Holes can be drilled the length of a person or depth of an entire family, ready for the next family member at the next funeral. Ashes take up even less space… I plan to be with my favorite mycelium.

Too much war, many natural disasters, and out of control humans, transform funeral homes, casket making, incinerators, and graveyard real estate into prudent investments. When euthanasia laws change, I’ll be marketing my no mess “Dr. Death Do It Yourself Kit”. DIY with Dignity & Grace.

Physical pollution enables Clean Air and Water to be monetized and become commodities. Soon, we’ll all need air and water purifiers. Perhaps oxygen will be marketed over the counter like bottled water. There will be Oxygen Aroma Bars where people can purchase a “vintage breath of fresh air” from the peaks of Everest, rain forests of Borneo, or other exotic locations. Designer oxygen masks and lemon scented oxygen will become fashionable.

By examining our plant world, we can observe and understand the cycles of our human world. To cultivate a healthy harvest, it’s important to select quality concepts for planting. We must clear away destructive and unproductive thoughts by planting positive ideas and visions in our collective minds and psyches. Right attitudes and positive circumstances will enable new hope to sprout. A healthy society must have healthy values and a natural supportive environment to encourage strong root growth. We must conserve our soil and nourish our fragile seedlings wherever, whenever, however, and in whatever ways we can to preserve our harvest.

We must invest in our future by nurturing all relationships and conditions that fortify our world. Our gardens will bud and blossom as we achieve unity within ourselves and each other. We can enrich our yield by sharing our processes from seed planting through final harvest. Many varieties of herbs, vegetables, and fruits can thrive together in a garden. Many kinds of people can thrive in our world. Thinking of humanity as a flourishing garden ensures a bountiful crop of happiness, prosperity, peace of mind, and purity for ALL SOULS and the SOUL of ALL!

Stay tuned as my writing and artwork darken and my hopeful raves become hopeless rants.

HOW I LOST MY SANITY 6

Classes were going well. Patients shared their ideas and the desire to make them real. Initially, I’d fabricate parts to be assembled by Jim, Juan, and Ethan. Making practical and useful objects was great for their self-esteem. Everyone was impressed. The director of the hospital suggested implementing a pilot project which required redesigning, fabricating, and installing a new office for her. We could use recycled materials. Dolores believed this was a perfect opportunity to shine and get brownie points for us. I’d also get approval to design and build a horticultural lab.

Everything was falling into place. Creative ideas germinated. One of the most valuable lessons I learned as an industrial designer was that you get more money for fashion. I eagerly recalled the ugly green frog vases I’d seen in ceramic workshops across the state. Why not use the same materials, resources, and labor to create Classic urns with unusual finishes?

Sheltered workshops survived by producing plain outdated designs. They could thrive with smart design and well-conceived manufacturing and marketing processes and plans. Ordinary wooden frames could be transformed into exotic frames with fashionable new moldings. Beautiful mirrors and other fashionable products could revitalize a dying industry.

I began to see my vocational class as a small business having a dozen workers with talents and abilities I could never afford in the real world. I had a captive audience with nothing better to do with their time, energies, and talents than work under my direction. I could arrange for them to make money and challenge them to be responsible for their behavior. It certainly seemed clinically sound to me. I fantasized we’d eventually be the design and marketing arm for the entire Underworld State Department of Mental Health. Win, win, win… or so it seemed.

We would design products for manufacture, arrange preferential buying plans with other state agencies, and create products for the mass market. I was directing a theatrical production, a sequel to the ‘Dirty Dozen’. ‘The Dirtiest Dozen’ ~ tales of how discards from hell became social heroes. I envisioned managing a manufacturing and marketing empire using mental asylums as the foundation and framework.

‘Crazy People’, one of my all-time favorite ‘crazy’ movies with Dudley Moore and Daryl Hannah was about how crazy ‘Truth’ in advertising is. The truth is that stability and success in mental illness treatment would open new doors to working with sheltered workshops everywhere and offer sustenance and nourishment for all.

My family was supportive, but believed I was bonkers the moment I decided to work with a bunch of nutcases and freaks for next to nothing. There wasn’t anyone else around to share my inspiration and ideas with. Many of my peers in rehab thought I was weird. Sharing anything with them would add to the already uncomfortable hospital gossip. My close friends were mostly supportive, but I needed help from a mastermind group. I’d just have to stay focused, moving forward one step at a time, every thought, idea, and action bringing me closer to my goals.

Over the next several weeks, both vocational groups came up with exciting new concepts. Betsy had an idea for a line of stuffed toys for children that were perfect items for sheltered sewing shops. She called them `Love Bugs’. There were insects like spiders and scorpions. You’d be terrified if they were crawling on you, but instead, they’re soft and cuddly.

David and Jim came up with a unique new idea for modular interconnecting building materials. Unlike Legos or Lincoln Logs, they were fabricated from discarded, recycled, and repurposed materials and processes. We created several prototypes of quarter scale furniture. Potential markets were opening in our minds and hearts, and we believed that they would soon manifest.

Jack and Virginia created a very timely and clever `Women’s Liberation Survival Kit’. It was a cloth bag made of a military style denim camouflage material, hand sewn, silk screened, and featuring a collection of pockets and compartments filled with supplies like tampons, packs of condoms, birth control dispensers, a small canister of pepper spray, a compressed air horn, female paraphernalia, cosmetics, and other assorted goodies.

I made appointments with buyers and merchandise managers from major retail department stores to get feedback and gain additional insight into our products and planning. A few buyers wanted to know when they could purchase our products. One merchandise manager expressed doubt about connecting expensive merchandise with mentally unstable people. He thought it might detract from their marketability. ‘Manufactured by forensic psychiatric workshops’ was not the best-selling point.

Our team felt that wasn’t an obstacle. Like Republicans, we’d suppress bad news and glamorize alternative facts and good news. Patients were inspired and excited about the opportunity. Positive behavioral changes were taking place. I felt motivated. Everyone was beginning to notice as we made ourselves ready to negotiate with hospital administration and sheltered workshops across the state. I couldn’t believe how well everything was moving forward. The great white whale was in my sights.

Stay tuned as my white whale becomes a white elephant and all of our efforts head south…

HOW I LOST MY SANITY ~ Episode 4

There were only two patients in the art room. One was warily tucked in a corner, the other was a pretty twenty something African-American woman quietly cutting colored paper with a child’s scissors. I gently mused out loud. “You look healthy and normal. Why are you here?”

“My psychiatrist tells me it’s because I feel no remorse for what I did.”

“What did you do?”

“I killed my roommate”. I chopped her up in the bathtub and flushed as much of her as I could down the toilet. The rest of her I put in black plastic garbage bags that I tossed in a dumpster.”

“Did you think you would get away with that?”

“I didn’t think at all. I got the idea from TV.”

“And you don’t feel badly about what you did?”

“The girl is dead. There’s nothing I can do about that!” “I guess I’m sorry for her family”.

Mary grew up in a verbally abusive emotionally constipated family with no privacy. When Mary left home, she applied for a single room at college and was forced to have a roommate. Enduring a year, Mary reapplied, and lost the room to her roommate. Completely losing control of her mind and heart while stuck in a state of rage, Mary eliminated her problem.

Many strange stories unfolded over the next several months in the art room. Every day promised new adventure. I was glad I’d survived the bog of bureaucratic bullshit. I was yearning to examine everyone’s hands, but decided to wait. I anticipated astonishing tales of intrigue and amazing artworks. Many patients had artistic talent. There were two professional artists in the group. I supported everyone’s creativity and acquired special materials and supplies above and beyond my call of duty.

The first patient I bonded with was a refined and cultivated woman in her mid to late fifties. Bizarre circumstances led to Betsy’s hapless and senseless captivity. She lived on Treasure Island, a wealthy seaside community. Betsy managed an art gallery and was gossip columnist for a local newspaper. She loved to garden and was a member of a local gardening club.

A lawyer of considerable power purchased the land adjoining Betsy’s and neglected it. Weeds and branches drooped and draped sloppily onto Betsy’s property. Her neighbor‘s obvious dislike of landscaping and disdain for his neighbors annoyed the hell out of Betsy. One very vexing afternoon, she verbally threatened to chop off everything extending onto her domain. Grabbing her ax, she angrily severed every limb over her property line. While quietly recuperating on her porch, Betsy became alarmed and frightened when police in plain clothes marched aggressively through the gate of her yard.

Betsy grabbed her ax, attempting to chase them away. The next thing she knew, Betsy was sedated in a psychiatric hospital for further evaluation. Her neighbor had pulled strings and managed to have her temporarily committed. Then her serious problems began. Because Betsy was so agitated, Thorazine was prescribed, mandated, and administered. Betsy had a bad reaction to Thorazine. She was rushed to a local hospital. Her spleen had to be removed.

Betsy was no criminal. Nor was she crazy. She had great character references. Her son, a successful architect, pleaded fervently for her release, but no one appeared able to help her. A series of unfortunate events had led to her getting caught up in ‘The System’. Betsy’s attitude remained positive and optimistic while her mental and physical health deteriorated. She lost three productive years of her life. The lawyer tried to acquire Betsy’s property while she was locked up, but her son successfully blocked him.

Everyone admired Betsy. I was self-appointed president of her fan club. She could draw, paint, sculpt, and write better than anyone. She won several patient art awards. She was a positive role model. As editor and illustrator for the patient newspaper, The Scene. Betsy also created signage for hospital activities and events. I got special permissions for her creative seamstress work and purchased (my $) supplies like needles, threads, and unique fabrics.

Betsy designed stuffed insects. She called them ‘love bugs’. Sewing and sowing the seeds of success in my mind, Betsy inspired me to imagine a patient run cottage industry within the confines of hospital life that would serve other sheltered workshops in social and medical worlds. We could be a source for products, design, and marketing.

I got braver each day as I investigated patients’ lives. I couldn’t divulge my appetite for wanting to know more, but I did look as closely as I could at their records, hands, and gestures. I printed crude hands using newsprint paper with poster paint. I assumed madness would be revealed in aberrations of hand morphology and topography. There were many unusual hands. I saw a lot of frustration, anger, and fear, along with an uncanny clarity or lack of clarity in thinking. Many souls saw only one solution to their problem, never considering the consequences. Invoking hindsight enables most folk to harness our strengths, mindsets, attitudes, and actions, and embrace whatever challenges we encounter on the path to becoming healthier and happier.

Repressed rage, confused minds, and constipated emotions rule mental illness. I’d never have predicted from the hands that I read, that most of these people would be committed to mental institutions. Many patients lacked peripheral lines. They were less neurotic than the wounded healers with highly developed superegos and many more peripheral lines who were paid to care for them.

I only saw one club (murderer’s) thumb in the patient population. I expected to see many more Mr. Hydes, motivated by passion, lacking impulse control, and having a propensity for violence. I didn’t. Other hands were soft and supple. Sometimes their bones felt detached. There was zero energy, enthusiasm, or desire to think clearly or do anything meaningful. I observed one psychotic person’s skin as appearing splotchy purplish red. I imagined the color combo was repressed rage. Many hands were stiff in the joints, preventing the lost souls trapped in limbo between their inside and outside from escaping. I examined schizophrenic hands with two sets of head or heart lines in dominant hands that were ambiguous, ambivalent, suffering, struggling, and striving to know themselves and others.

Betsy and I loved the symbolism of the Tarot. We consulted the cards many times with many questions. We rarely heard what we wanted to hear, but always heard what we already knew. I collected birth names, dates, times, and places from patients, but didn’t explain why.

Most artwork and poetry in The Scene came from the art room. The patient newspaper was a venue for creative expression for patients and staff. It offered hospital news and provided space for patients to express their concerns and share their creativity. It was an important venue because it provided an outlet for frustration, anger, and depression. Everyone spent too much time complaining and blaming their problems on ‘The System’ and each other.

I decided to become a spiritual ambassador and good sense maker. The real enemies were our bad habits, bureaucracy, and time. We were a team whether we chose ‘to be or not to be’.

One notorious patient infected my psyche with doubt. He was a young black man in his early thirties. Fred had been mentally, emotionally, and physically malnourished via many abusive foster parents. A gentle kindness lie beneath the surface of Fred’s deeply scarred face. Fred was violent, but it wasn’t knife fights and gang warfare that got him locked up. It was Fred’s unrequited love. Fred was obsessed with a teenage girl. Allegedly, she was ‘taken away from him’ by an `abusive maniac’. Fred created realistic ‘WANTED DEAD or ALIVE’ posters of his maniac. He posted them all over town, offering a phony ten thousand dollar reward for him. Fred had no clue he was creating evidence that would lead him directly to the loony bin.

Fred’s large feminine hands, rectangular palms, long slender knotty fingers, and conical fingertips embody the quintessential ‘feeling’ type: great for empathy, appreciating art, research, organizing, paying attention to detail, and mostly for caring. Fred’s long head line sloped into the heel of his hand, revealing a vivid imagination and rich fantasy life. Fred could copy anything perfectly. He could have been a master forger, but that particular crime would never have occurred to him. I cheered Fred’s abilities and encouraged him to draw from real life. I also convinced his treatment team and security on his ward to let him have pencils and paper and allow him to draw under supervision.

Fred had a private sketch book. He produced forty or fifty sketches and drawings in the first month and showed no one. I asked to see them. Reluctantly, he showed them to me. I was blown away. The political parody above was his first. That’s Ronald Reagan and its meaning is self-explanatory. What stunned me most were caricatures of staff sexually abusing patients. Patients were pleasuring staff in the sickest possible ways. Were security, therapists, and patients actually having bizarre sex acts using objects of pleasure and pain or was Fred’s vision an artistic fabrication of his unique psyche?

How could Fred have witnessed what he was portraying? He had a graphic imagination. Maybe his friends were telling him their stories and he was interpreting them. Fred let me photocopy a few drawings. I wondered about the veracity of Fred’s artwork and shared it with Dolores. She showed it to the cabinet. Betraying Fred’s trust was my greatest blunder and regret. Fred fought fiercely as his drawings and supplies were confiscated. It wrenched my heart to watch him being reduced to a drug induced stupor, artistic genius, never to create (during my tenure) again. I was responsible and couldn’t stop thinking about it.

Mary 2 was a highly functioning, extremely troubled patient. Mary believed she was Satan’s child, a bad seed. Mary was three when she first unsuccessfully attempted to poison her little sister. Then she failed to drown her in the bathtub. She tied her to a tree in a lightning storm, hoping she’d be electrocuted. Finally, Mary’s dysfunctional fundamentalist Catholic parents enrolled her in a devout Catholic school. They hoped that would save her. Mary predictably became more twisted. At sixteen, Mary set a nun on fire and carved her charring body to a bloody pulp with a broken glass bottle. She told everyone, “The Devil made me do it”.

Mary produced dark artwork. I coveted and appropriated her drawings every chance I got. While under suicide watch in a maximum-security psychiatric hospital, Mary etched `666′ in the skin of her arms and legs with whatever sharp objects she could find. She also scratched ‘666’ on furniture.

I don’t frequently see hands that frighten me. Mary’s hands were scary. The creepy hand above with very stiff fingers that curl inwardly belong to Susan Atkins’ (Charles Manson’s protege’). They’re similar to Mary’s. Mary’s skin was hard, dry, coarse, and reddish. She chewed on her nails relentlessly, leaving her nail beds red, raw, and sore. Mary transformed self-critical into self-hatred. I wished I could help her let go of irrational terror. Mary’s soul was hard-boiled from the hellish reality of growing up with hypocritical parents, along with fundamentalist codes, irrational doctrines, punitive rules, and restrictive regulations.

Mary had a huge crush on me. She was the first to arrive at the art room and last to leave. I felt nauseous when I was alone with her. I was repulsed, but always smiled and acted nice. Mary generously offered to give me a quickie blow-job under my desk. I remembered Fred’s drawings and how easy it would be to become one of his vignettes. I thought about all of the Ministers and Priests, religious shepherds, who physically and spiritually rape the innocent lambs they are entrusted to protect. Does terror, shame, guilt, and disgrace trigger erotic fantasy? Is fear of being caught a turn on? Can the Devil sow the seeds of evil in a psyche?

Mary was hovering over me and monopolizing my attention. I was abrupt and impatient with her. Dark rings appeared around her darkening eyes. Mary felt rejected. Satan was hard at work, preparing her for evil acts that night on her ward. It was a full moon. Stealing the ‘six’ and ‘nine’ balls from the pool table, Mary loaded them in a black wool sock, then beat a new patient to death while she slept. The poor woman was there for shoplifting, a few days of observation, and psychiatric evaluation. Mary said she didn’t like the way the woman looked at her. She’d certainly think twice before shoplifting again had she survived. I felt guilty and responsible. I should have said something. Staff should have been more vigilant. Mental institutions aren’t called lunatic asylums for nothing.

It’s not what you do, but what you get away with that matters. Gene was undeniably the most incredible artist in the hospital. He’d been a successful commercial artist and advertising executive. Scuttlebutt was that he created the TV ads that everyone loves to remember.

Gene was unique. A celebrity on his ward, he had the only private room, outfitted with his own furniture, library, audio tape collection, state of art stereo system, Bose headphones, and grizzly bear rug.

No one messed with Gene. Dark satanic auras shrouded Gene. Angry facial expressions and aggressive body language told a tale of uncontrollable rage from a horrible childhood. Gene was hostile. Everything about him screamed, “Stay away from me!” In a jealous fury and fit of rage, Gene slit his girlfriend’s throat from ear to ear. She survived, didn’t press charges, and forgave him. Gene couldn’t forgive himself. He told me had to stay because he’d do it again.

Gene could have been free had he wanted to be and behaved accordingly. I tried to make good sense to Gene and convince him to become an active member of the real world again. Gene wanted to stay. With little interest in worldly freedom, he was free to love his literature, music, art, and still be king of the roost. I actually felt a little jealous of his inner freedom.

Gene was charismatic in a dark and dangerous way. He was the patient Dolores caught in the art supply closet with Janice. That untimely final exit for Janice turned out to be wonderful therapy for Gene. We frequently had philosophical discussions and co-created artworks that I still cherish. This life size pastel Gene drew of me in the art-room subtly captures a very private part of me.

Benny was Gene’s buddy. Benny was uncooperative. A strong fit black man in his early thirties, Benny’s phobia of homosexuality impelled the former transit policeman to assault a bar full of gay men one night with a semi-automatic weapon. While freebasing crack, Benny brutally slaughtered eight gay men.

Benny came up bi-yearly for forensic review. He believed he’d be set free one day, but was always rejected. One psychologist told me that a ‘secret agenda’ was to never ever let him go or know. It was in everyone’s best interest to humor Benny. Otherwise, he’d lose hope, become violent, and need to be permanently medicated.

There was never a dull day in the art room. One handsome young patient, recently admitted, had cut his mother’s heart out, artfully prepared, and hungrily ate it with her favorite knife and fork on her favorite plate while drinking her favorite wine and reclining in her favorite chair.

Another man was found combing his mother’s hair on her mantel, weeks after he had cut her head off. The entire hospital was full of lunatics and addicts who committed violent acts under the influences of bad circumstances, rage, or drugs. Schizophrenics, sociopaths, psychotics, and pathological liars flourished and blossomed. One sociopath from England had a Rolls Royce delivered to the hospital entrance based on conversations he had with a dealer from a pay phone in the hall of his ward. If only I could put everyone’s amazing talents to good use…

Jesus Jefferson was the angriest patient in the hospital. Rejected countless times by forensic committees, Jesus had nothing left to lose. Everyone steered clear of him. Jesus had thrown his girlfriend, her 3 year old child, and dog from a 17th story window. They died instantly as they hit the ground. Jesus had zero remorse and never spoke of the incident. He clearly needed to be locked up, but what of his other innate talents and abilities. I envisioned Jesus as a capable production manager in a patient run manufacturing business. I shared my idea with two staff psychologists and they agreed with me. Unfortunately, Jesus was too unpredictable and angry to be given any real opportunity to take real responsibility.

Names have meaning. Many people who end up in loony bins are named after biblical figures. Jesus, Mary, Faith, Angel, Grace, and Hope haunt wards at mental institutions everywhere. Whatever their parents had hoped, wanted, or expected… something else weird and perverted happened. My parody below represents my interpretation of present-day archetypal names.

MAGA = TRUMP vs chump

HOW I LOST MY SANITY3

After six to eight working days, I’d met most of the patients. There were five men’s wards and one women’s ward. The wards traveled around the hospital escorted by SHTA’s. One, two, or three wards at a time would meet in the rehab department for recreational/religious services. Many patients found religion while incarcerated. Evangelists, fundamentalists, and self-styled ministers attended every service, along with agnostics, atheists, and heretics. I counted four Jewish patients in the mix. Jewish services were most ludicrous of all. Patients of every shape, size, color, and religious denomination wore yarmulkes (skullcaps) and pretended to chant pigeon Hebrew. For attending religious services, patients received extra rewards such as cigarettes, tea bags, and candy. They also hoped to earn a few brownie points with God and the Forensic Committee when they came up for evaluation.

The next several months were both enlightening and frustrating. It was obvious I needed more clinical training specific to a forensic population. I reached from the Rehab department to make allies on the treatment teams and in the cabinet. Unfortunately, protocol and position are guidelines in public service. If you go directly to someone outside of your department on your own initiative, it can be misconstrued as a breach of faith or as a failure on the part of your supervisor to control her staff. Employees generate truckloads of surplus paperwork and ask permission for everything in writing. Dolores was reprimanded. I felt dejected.

My initial impression of patients was that they were generally dull and apathetic, motivated by bribery or extortion. Cigarettes (nicotine), candy (sugar), tea bags (caffeine), and little packets of Sanka rewarded good behaviors. I believed they were ultimately harmful and destructive. Extortion was punishment for bad behaviors. Having no rewards, no activities, temporary isolation, or mandatory drug treatments is really `Pavlov 101′ in practice.

There were two types of patients. Nearly all had committed acts of violence. Some were there for psychiatric evaluation. Others were assigned for long term care by the court system because they were unfit to stand trial or too mentally and emotionally disturbed to be in a normal prison setting. There were several mass murderers and serial killers. You’d never know it as they appeared meek, apathetic, and ordinary. As they grew to trust me, they revealed hopes, dreams, fears, and tales of intrigue and horror.

I was steadily earning the trust and respect of the rehab staff. I’d read Dolores’s hands. Within a month, I was asked by other staff members to share my insights and observations about them. The rehab staff was caring and well meaning. I observed unhealthy doses of neurosis combined with fear, paranoia, and overdeveloped senses of responsibility, obligation, and guilt. Public service feels thankless and hopeless to many of the staff. I tried to be constructive, helpful, and leave everyone feeling hopeful.

I suggested to Dolores that she practice saying “NO”. I advised Zandor not to react negatively to criticism, even if it’s personal. I nagged Billy (Skinny) to lighten up and see reality as it is and not how he wants it to be. I encouraged Luscious Lips to let go of his guilt, cultivate good habits (like controlling his indulgences), and begin to schedule activities to look forward to in his life. I applauded Barbara’s ability to maintain clear boundaries and thanked her for her honesty with herself and everyone else. I cheered Maya’s energy and enthusiasm. I let her know I supported whatever she wanted for herself. I wanted Janice to clearly see and express herself creatively.

My reputation as a hand analyst spread quickly. Soon, I was in the hospital director’s office reading her hands. Dr. Helga presented a caring and friendly demeanor, but after examining her hands for a couple of minutes, I was positive it was an act. She had the stiffest hands and fingers I’d ever felt, inwardly curving pinkie fingers, and a clear simian line in her dominant hand. Knotty fingers and long index fingers were well suited for a detail-oriented directorship. Helga’s father had been a German SS or gestapo who ran a Nazi concentration camp during World War II. There was no place for emotion in Helga’s formative years. She was calculating, ambitious, and couldn’t tolerate disobedience. She ordered me to never discuss what I saw with anyone and told me in no uncertain terms to stay away from patient hands. I gained insight into the cabinet by reading several members directly and by carefully listening and observing body language at meetings and in casual exchanges without permission.

It took six months to learn the ropes while generating and accumulating huge masses of paperwork and proposals. I was ready to present my syllabus for prevocational classes to the cabinet when the hand of fate unexpectedly intervened. A quirky thing happened. Dolores accidentally caught Janice, the art therapist, in the art supply closet with her skirt up around her ears. She was dispensing her own personal form of emotional and physical therapy to one of the male patients. Janice was fired instantly.

Janice had self-destructed. I’d lucked out. There was no art therapist. I was the only staff member qualified to fill in until another was hired. I knew about art. I didn’t know the first thing about art therapy or forensic psychology. That didn’t seem to faze anybody. I was thrilled to put everything aside to be the new substitute art therapist. I’d finally get to meet patients. Nearly all the patients frequented the art room. It was a chance to play with art materials and express themselves creatively. They could sculpt with clay, draw and paint, make collages, write poetry, and play music. I’d examine their hands, astrology, and experiment with tarot on them. This was an important lesson in human nature and my nature that I’ll never forget.

The art room was small and private (14’X 14′). I was happy about that because in addition to having the potential for intimacy, I was required to inventory every pencil, crayon, scissor, and even staple. These were all considered potentially dangerous weapons. Everything in Rehab was either bolted down or fastened together with special screws and nuts that required special tools to unfasten. Every precaution was taken to protect us from patients and patients from each other and themselves.

One very crazy patient who seriously creeped me out was James. After James’s mother would visit him, staff would find him mutilating his genitals with a paperclip, staple, or whatever he could find that caused damage. James eventually died of AIDS after repeatedly letting other male patients have their way with him sexually. I stayed away from James’s hands, but I do remember ugly brown tobacco stains between the tips of his index and middle fingers from letting cigarettes burn to ash without taking a puff.

I was cautious around patients. I tried to be helpful. I spoke little except when spoken to. I’d sometimes sketch patients. They saw me drawing and sculpting and began asking for artistic advice. I happily provided tips and tricks. It took over six months to locate a new art therapist. During this time, I’d meet a dozen patients who would influence my destiny.

Stay tuned to meet the patients…

Author’s note: If you’ve read the first episode of ‘How I lost my Sanity’, you know my writing is a combo of fact and fiction. Using the same voice as my non-fiction writing may create some confusion. I break rules of grammar and syntax. A generous helping of political and social incorrectness sheds darkness on my protagonist. Made up names and characters from movies parody and give faces to characters in my story. If you have any thoughts, ideas, feelings, suggestions, advice, or whatever about my writing and story, feel free to comment.

HOW I LOST MY SANITY

I spent two years working part time, two days a week designing vocational rehabilitation programs at a forensic psychiatric hospital. I wanted to get to know that population. A year had passed when I got my first big break to finally delve into the clients. Rehab was responsible for holiday activities and Halloween was about to happen. “Wouldn’t it be fun if you were our fortune teller this year?” Dolores (my boss) inquired. I named myself “M”, ‘palmist’, dressed in satin robes with sun, moon, pentacles (five-pointed star), and a hand-crafted silver hand hung round my neck.

Caricature by Chris Wynter

Within moments of examining each a patient’s hands, I pinpointed their behavioral issues, current obstacles, and major life challenges. Most reacted, “Hey, you’re for real!” or “You really know me!”. I carefully tailored my words to their ability to understand. Most competent readers know that it’s not what you see, but what you say and how you say it that matters. Inadvertently, Dolores had set me up as a confidant. You never know what you’ll hear or what you’ll say when a person you’re talking to believes you already know their secrets and future. Word of my abilities spread quickly. I soon gained many new recruits who became regulars.

Mohamed was ‘a lifer’. He’d been given enough Thorazine to sedate a small army. As a giant sized middle-aged black man, he looked like a dark blend of Muhammad Ali and Bob Marley. As one of the most popular patients in the hospital, Mohamed had been a Hell’s Angel, cocaine addict, and cold-blooded murderer. He found `religion’ during solitary confinement. I began receiving Plain Truth magazine shortly after I met him. He had placed me on their mailing list. I learned about contraband from Mohamed. Patients with money got marijuana, alcohol, extra cigarettes, Sanka, and a myriad of other illegal stuff smuggled through security.

One not to notice occurrence was the way large quantities of office and recreational supplies would arrive and vanish quickly. I began hoarding yellow pads, pens, and pencils, hiding them in my desk before they disappeared. Staff were getting away with whatever they could. Even office machines vanished. When I asked a friend in a nearby hospital what was happening, she replied that it was “par for the course”.

Many people who work for government agencies have a chronic poverty consciousness that makes them feel inferior, underappreciated, and entitled to get away with whatever they can. Most workers in helping professions give too much and don’t ask enough for themselves.

Nothing was as it appeared. One security staff member who habitually acted friendly with patients, said to me in confidence, “I’d shoot every one of them in the head at night while they slept if I could get away with it”. I pretended he was joking but was really shocked and awed. Watching patients pretending to be what and how they believed staff wanted them to be was a spectator sport. When backs were turned, patients would give staff their middle finger or spontaneously contort their faces. Staff often behaved similarly to patients and each other.

Sometimes it was `Show Time’. An organization whose job it was to inspect state hospital social service programs was called `XYZ’. The ‘powers that be’ at the top of the mental health food chain got plenty of notice from XYZ. Inspectors showed up to lots of hustle, bustle, and productivity. We ran smoothly, like ‘Timex’ when observers were around. Everyone was active and cooperative, and everything was orderly and `spic and span’. In truth, we were scuzzy, and programming ran unpredictably… you know, the kinds of things inspectors need to see.

The state allots monies for capital improvements and program development each year. Unspent monies are removed from the following year’s budget. A $100,000.00 surplus needed to be spent quickly. A scam that affected me was the creation of a woodworking and refinishing shop. The cabinet approved purchasing expensive woodworking equipment for the Rehab Dept. They failed to inform us that the patients would ‘never’ be permitted to use the tools as they were ‘much too dangerous’.

I questioned Billy (other half of my position) about who was going to operate the equipment. He told me that he and I would initially do the machining, but eventually certain patients would be trusted. I disagreed. None of our conjecture mattered, because when the fiscal year was over, the cabinet scrapped the shop. Now they could ask for more money next year. You’ll appreciate this picture of me and Billy at the annual Xmas party. Even Santa was a lunatic!

I figured if everyone else was getting away with things, so could I. `Gigolo’ worked maximum security at the secure entrance. When no one was around, he’d wave me past the bag check and metal detector. Even the director of the hospital was scanned and checked daily. I took advantage of his trust by waiting outside the hospital entrance until no one was in the foyer. I became ‘Smiley’, who always entered the security area with a big smile on my face. Gigolo would wave me through. In my briefcase was a camera, tape recorder, and extra tapes. I began recording patient songs and stories. I could and so I did.

Virginia was abandoned by her mother at birth. Fished out of a garbage can, Virginia grew up in orphanages. She had a grade school education and never developed work skills. Virginia ventured out into the world on her own. She became pregnant as an adolescent and a magnet for one co-dependent abusive spouse after the other. Virginia prayed her children weren’t forsaken by God, but they were. They were homeless and starving. She loved them too much to watch them starve to death. So, she killed them. What else could she do?

Virginia’s haunting voice expresses the agony of her soul. I saw her as a cross between Billie Holiday and Nina Simone. I found her tunes and lyrics profoundly poetic and deeply disturbing. She asked me to share one of my choosing.

“CRIES OF PAIN, CRIES OF JOY

SCREAMS OF TORMENT WITHIN

SILENTLY WHISPERING INNER FEAR

A WALL OF PRETENSE TO HIDE

BITTER REALITY WITH NO REMORSE

CHANGING MOODS, ALWAYS DENY

TRUTH IN A WORLD OF UNENDING STRIFE

REACHING OUT THE LAYER OF LIFE

DREAMING OF THE EVERYDAY CHARADE

MOVING FACES IN A MASQUERADE

REVEALING THE UNRELENTING SOUL

OF A TIRED AND LONELY BEING

HIDDEN QUALITIES SOARING BENEATH

THE EXTERNAL EXISTENCE ABOVE

COULD THE ENERGY EXIST TO FIGHT

THE SHADOWY SILHOUETTE OF I?”

“Have you ever seen a hand that frightened you?”

I often hear that question. It was a sweltering day. A chill entered my soul as I touched Manuel’s hot sweaty palms. His huge reddish balls of thumb were full (like they’d been stuffed with extra-large eggs) and smooth with no lines. The image on the left is simulated. The ball of thumb on the right is mine. Many significant relationship lines lie within my lifeline. I love lots of people. Manuel had no lines. Manuel had a mega-dose of desire, lust, and passion; nourished by fear, anger, and hatred. Unfortunately, Manuel had zero ability to have intimacy with other human beings. He allegedly kidnapped eight little boys, took them to rooftops, raped, murdered, cut their penises off, and carved crosses in the bases of their skulls.

Manuel pleaded not guilty by reason of insanity. He was committed to a maximum-security forensic hospital for the criminally insane. When I met Manuel, he had been dying of kidney disease. He’d been on dialysis machines for five years. His kidneys were shot. There would be no donor for a child serial killer. Manuel’s time was running out. He wanted to tell his story and asked me to record it. Before accepting Manuel’s word, I examined his hospital records and psychiatric treatment plans. Dozens of articles about the murders were recorded on microfilm in the news section of the public library.

Although the evidence was circumstantial, Manuel fit the profile. The media had generated a public frenzy. Hundreds of detectives and policemen were on the case. The first suspect had to be disguised as a policeman in order to not be lynched by the public.” It took over two hundred police, some wearing riot gear, to prevent over 1000 angry people from storming the xxx police station in the mistaken belief that a suspect in the mutilation murders of four young boys was inside the building.”

Manuel’s ball of thumb is the star of his story. Manuel came to the USA from Puerto Rico at age thirteen with his father and brother. He had great aspirations, but says he got hooked on drugs (marijuana) and headed downhill after that. Manuel said to me, “Drug addiction was in my genes. From the first time I tasted drugs, I never stopped”. A huge round ball of thumb symbolizes sensuality, compulsion, and indulgence. A paradox is that a large ball of thumb can also symbolize a huge appreciation of nature, children, art, music, and all things beautiful, along with abundant generosity and warmth. Manuel’s low set thumb and very stiff fingers and life and head line closely tied together at their start symbolizes that Manuel’s patterns and habits were deeply embedded.

Many thieves and pick pockets have inwardly curving pinkies. Hooked on heroine, Manuel resorted to stealing drugs to support his habit. He hung out with prostitutes and criminals. Meanwhile, his mother died of brain cancer, his sister died of cirrhosis of the liver, his half-brother died of a drug overdose, and his other brother was locked up for murdering their crazy father. Manuel’s tale would make an extremely dark TV sitcom.

Manuel dealt heroine to support his habit. When he turned sixteen, he was arrested for drug dealing. In “Purgatory’s tombs”, Manuel began banging his head against the wall. He was sent to a minimum-security outpatient mental hospital to detox and six months later he believed his habit was broken. Manuel discovered he had talents in arts and cooking. He tried living with a woman at seventeen, but he couldn’t stay out of trouble. While in and out of prisons and mental hospitals, Manuel managed to get his common-law wife pregnant three times; two daughters and a son. One daughter had to be on dialysis for failed kidneys.

Manuel spent five years in a state penitentiary while his family survived on welfare. The prison system tried to rehabilitate Manuel by teaching him several different trades. He had the best of intentions but was unable stay out of trouble. Next, he found religion and went to live in a church. Becoming fundamentalist and fanatical, Manuel began preaching from the bible to his family, friends, and strangers on the street. He claimed he tried to stay away from drugs, but even a drag from a cigarette or sip of beer would rekindle his addiction.

A combination of drugs and religion led to grandiosity. I was greater than God. I really believed I was Jesus Christ”. Manuel took medication for his hallucinations. On drugs, he could temporarily cope. If he forgot, he’d become mentally and physically ill. Manuel began taking speed and cocaine again. His delusions and hallucinations became more grandiose. One forensic psychiatrist described Manuel as a “walking time bomb”, a violent psychopath destined for evil and a forensic lifestyle.

Several authorized and unauthorized exits from QRS, a low security mental hospital, coincided with the mutilation deaths of young boys. Manuel was seen preaching on the streets near the scene of one crime. He was connected to other murder locations because of relatives who lived nearby. Manuel denied killing the boys. A court appointed defense attorney talked him into copping a plea of insanity. Manuel claimed he didn’t know anything about the legal system and just followed his lawyer’s advice.

“I was sold down the river. Everyone needed a murderer, and I was him”. Manuel was declared criminally insane. There were no more mutilations of children after he was put away. I secretly believed Manuel committed those crimes. I also felt compassion for him. He was born on the short end of a very hard thorny stick in both the nature and nurture departments.

I was repulsed by him, but I also realized that Manuel might have been a very different person had he had real love and nourishment in his childhood. Manuel could have had a healthier and happier life with the right nurture.

I read almost every hand in the hospital, but never shared anyone’s secrets with anyone else. Rehab staff considered me harmless. They were more neurotic than the patients. Many had overdeveloped superegos. Most of them did what they knew they could get away with. Most patients had huge ids with no superego. They did what they thought they had to do, never contemplating the consequences of what they did. They saw only one solution to a problem. Patients generally had fewer peripheral lines in their palms than staff who were more confused.

I published an appeal to patients interested in participating in something creative and fun.

I was `M’, the fortune teller at our Halloween celebration. Mark is my name. I came here as a vocational instructor. Many of you know me as part-time art therapist. I’m actually an industrial designer. I design products for manufacturing companies and teach design at local colleges. I sometimes offer workshops to help creative people and inventors manifest their creations.

One year ago (this week), I began working here. I hoped I could motivate many of you to nourish your natural talents and abilities. I planned to offer guidance and support on projects of your creation. I assumed you’d be inspired by an opportunity to work on your own projects. Over the past year, I‘ve heard many reasons why you can’t or don’t want to be involved.

You’ve become so used to circumstances being hard that you can’t imagine anything else. Disappointment is too painful. You’re afraid to be enthusiastic. You’re afraid to trust anyone. Your self-esteem is too low. You’re not worthy or capable, but I assure you, you are.

I’m appealing to anyone who feels inspired or curious about their potentials and is willing to make a commitment to a weekly schedule to work under my direction. You must be accepted to participate in my class. A brief interview with Mr. Cartozian, the Rehab Counselor, will be required. His approval, along with the support of your treatment team will determine your eligibility. If you want my help, you’ve got it.

I promise to dedicate myself to helping class members make their projects a reality. Any project you choose is fine as long as it’s possible. Twelve students will participate in classes. There will be two work / study groups with six students each. Each will meet twice per week; one session on Tuesday and one session on Wednesday.

Here’s my vision: We’re motivated about our projects and willing to do whatever it takes to make them happen. We’re sharing in healthy constructive ways and learning a lot from everyone’s projects. We’re learning to draw and make things in our workshop. Many projects are happening; works of art, music, writing, and producing practical items like furniture, magazine racks, floral planters, and boxes of all shapes and sizes. If you can envision yourself in my class, please speak with me directly in the Rehab Department on a Tuesday or a Wednesday over the next several weeks.

I began preparing for my vocational classes. Some of my favorite patients were ready to sign up. Others I’d tried to interest remained apathetic. I published an appeal for my ‘vocational classes’ in the ‘Scene’, the patient newspaper. The response was better than I expected. It’s what happened as a result of my choices and actions that drove me out of my mind.

Stay tuned.

i~Hermes

i~HERMES

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The lips of wisdom are closed, except to the ears of understanding.”

Alchemy is not transforming lead into gold. Hermes turned Saturn (Lead) into Sun (Gold) by building stable structures on solid foundations, being disciplined, and focusing on his metaphysical quest to prepare mentally, emotionally, and spiritually to connect to any and all others at any and all times. Alchemy is a set of magical formulas, tools, and esoteric instruction for becoming healthier, happier, and more fulfilled in life. Alchemy is the mastery of mental forces by transmuting one mental vibration into another. Our Sun passing through Gemini ~ May 21st to June 21st is a perfect time to share our selves on a soul level with anyone and everyone who is able!

Every thought is made up of individual cells; physically, mentally, and spiritually connected to all other cells on all other planes at the same time. Our brains are our cell communication hardware while our minds transmit and receive messages. Relationships between cells cause energy and matter to vibrate on different planes of reality at different times and places. Combining physical, mental, and spiritual planes, enables us to connect any with any and every being at any and every time and place. We can achieve wholeness by letting go of fear, taking a leap of faith, making connections, tuning our links, and creating nourishing environments.

“While ALL is in “The ALL”, it is equally true that “The ALL” is in ALL. “To him who truly understands this truth hath come great knowledge”. The inner nature of “The ALL” is unknowable and indefinable. That’s why humanity needs anthropomorphic gods and institutionalized religion. Spirit is the essence that embodies “ALL”. Spirituality requires the recognition, realization, and manifestation of Great Spirit within and without.

Hermes Seven Laws

Law of Polarity”: “Everything is dual; everything has poles; everything has its pair of opposites; like and unlike are the same; opposites are identical in nature but different in degree; extremes meet; all truths are but half-truths; all paradoxes may be reconciled.”

“The Secret” is only a secret to the uninitiated. The ‘Laws of Attraction’ work best when you know what you desire, and your intentions are clear. Polarity is spiritual magnetism.

Anyone can turn negative thinking into positive circumstances by letting go of fear, having clear intent, choosing a worthy quest, and doing the work. See how the ‘Law of Polarity’ transformed trash into treasure!

GURU of GARBAGE (Click for short video ~ Good Day NY)

Opposites are extremes of the same basic substance with varying degrees between. Where does heat end and cold begin? Where does darkness leave off and light begin? What about positive and negative, hard and soft, sharp and dull, noisy and quiet, high and low? The same principle operates on a mental plane. Love and hate are simply degrees of the same thing. In the middle are shades of like and dislike. Vibrations of hate can be transmuted into vibrations of love through the art of polarization, a phase of alchemy known and practiced by ancient and modern masters.

Hermes other Six ‘Secrets’

Correspondence, Mentalism, Vibration, Rhythm, Cause, Effect, and Gender are Hermes other six Laws. Practicing metaphysical principles enabled Hermes and enables anyone to explore, examine, and explain the unexplained, and to execute any and all thoughts, ideas, and visions.

Having inner and outer wisdom has helped critical thinkers throughout history to unlock mysteries using Hermetic thought and principles. Hermetic masters possess knowledge of transcendental astronomy called astrology, transcendental chemistry called alchemy, and transcendental psychology called mystic psychology. Confucius, Galileo, Plato, Pythagoras, Aristotle, Nostradamus, Leonardo Da Vinci, Benjamin Franklin, George Washington, Sigmund Freud, Carl Jung, and Joseph Campbell were all Grand Masters of Hermetic thought and principles.

Astrology is a symbolic system that compares and contrasts our heavens with affairs of man on earth. Astrology unlocks ancient and modern mysteries using Hermes second principle of correspondence “As Above, So Below, as below, so above”.

An infinite variety of characters, plots, and archetypal tales are mirrored in lots of dysfunctional humans, unable to see the forests from the trees. Too many lost souls are Idolizing gold-plated Calves on brass-plated pedestals and Worshiping Sacred Cows on the Altars of Nonsense. The human race has become a race against self-created bad shit happening. Our planet’s sixth extinction is nearing more quickly than we think.

Hermes was Greek god of wisdom, wealth, trade, luck, fertility, language, animal husbandry, thieves, travelers, sleep, and providing safe passage to death. Mercury was Hermes’ Roman version, messenger of gods and ruler of Gemini. Thoth, in ancient Egypt, was a lunar god and patron of science, literature, wisdom, and invention. Loki was the Norse god of mischief. In Tarot, Hermes, a Magician at a crossroads has crucial decisions to make and critical actions to take. Merlin, Gondolf, Harry Potter, and Dumbledore are modern Hermes. Having metaphysical tools and mystical knowledge enabled Hemes and enables ALL of us to choose our thoughts, feelings, what to do, and who to be.

Hermes was reputedly a real person who lived for 350 years in the flesh in ancient Egypt. Refusing to age, Hermes misspent much of his adolescence as a trickster and petty thief. He was ‘Puck’ in ‘Midsummer Night’s Dream’. He’s Peter Pan, a Gemini, who never grows old.

A 76 year old Hermes, I’m no longer adolescent. Peter needs and depends on Wendy. My Wendy is Joanna, Aries with Taurus rising. She strongly disagrees with my assessment. I call her ‘Rambull’. I’m a Gemini with Scorpio rising. She calls me ‘a piece of work in progress’. Being born twelve years apart makes us ‘the bores’ at Chinese New Year’s parties. I’m a Pig on a Mountain. She’s a Pig in a Monastery.

Wendy is a Virgo type, a practical and responsible friend who darns Peter’s socks, sews his shadow back on, and patiently awaits his return as he flies away to Neverland whenever he chooses. Wendy brings an awareness that balances Peter’s ambiguous and ambivalent thoughts and feelings with clarity and good sense.

Michael Jackson actually lived in Neverland. Priscilla and Liz were his Wendys. Johnny Depp is Peter Pan who played Edward Scissorhands, Alice in Wonderland, Pirates of the Carribean, Charlie in the Chocolate Factory, and many other child centered characters. Hermes & Aphrodite gave birth to Hermaphrodite. David Bowie has flourished and blossomed in musical creativity, originality, and androgynous performance art.

Know thyself. Common sense without good sense is nonsense. Cultivate clear vision. Make wise choices. Nourish real relationships. Choose right uses of will power. Act decisively. Maintain positive attitudes. Balance courage, strength, wisdom, and grace with critical thinking, real feelings, and right actions. Having solid faith creates strong structures on sound foundations. We can change our destiny and the destiny of our planet on a cellular level by raising our vibration, polarity, and rhythm.

PISCES & PSYCHE

Personal and Collective Psyche transforms as outer planets change signs and geometric relationships. Uranus was the only outer planet to pass through Pisces (1919–1928) in the 20th Century. Uranus’s eighty-four-year cycle was completed when he returned to Pisces from 2003–2011. Uranus (destroyer) in Pisces and Neptune (visionary) in Aquarius are masters of illusion and delusion. Pluto in Capricorn transforms religious, social, economic, and cultural paradigms. Uranus moved into Taurus in 2019. An unstable economy rattled collective psyche as it destabilized markets through fluctuating interest rates and sudden unpredictable changes.

Comparing and contrasting Ideologies from 1919 and 2003 are both alarming and enlightening. If hindsight is 2020, it’s 2023. What has happened and not happened?

1919 WORLD SERIES SCANDAL

1919 ~ Worst baseball scandal (Black Sox) in history occurred when a grand jury brought indictments against eight players from the White Sox who were accused of throwing the 1919 World Series. They were eventually found not guilty.

 2003 ~ Complicit use of illicit steroids was the biggest scandal in modern baseball.

Bottle of bonded medicinal whiskey

For Medical Purposes Only”

1919 ~ Eighteenth Amendment prohibited the manufacture, sale, or transportation of intoxicating liquors, which encouraged distilling, brewing, and bootlegging.

2003 ~ George W. Bush prohibited Medicare from negotiating drug prices. Black markets for pharmaceutical and illicit drugs from India, Canada, and Mexico thrived. Cannabis became medicinal.

1921 ~ Formal investigations into the Teapot Dome oil scandals were initiated.

2003 ~ USA invaded Iraq under false pretenses to secure oil resources.

1924 ~ Worst tornado in US history obliterated 35 towns in Tennessee, Kentucky, Missouri, Indiana, and Illinois.

2005 ~ Hurricane Katrina devastated New Orleans and the Gulf Coast.

Gaia needs us to turn bad intentions and habits into healthy strategies and actions.

1919 ~ World War I ended; consumerism, immigration, discrimination, extremism, and fundamentalism began and grew. Uranus in Pisces, Neptune in Leo, and Pluto in Cancer combined to impel four million steel workers and miners to walk off their job to protest “too many work hours” and “inhumane pay”.

2003 ~ Increased wage inequality between workers at the top, middle, and bottom resulted in less wages and compensation for workers. Despite increased productivity, real wages and compen­sation continue to stagnate. Haves have. Have nots have not.

Four conservative Republican Presidents (Harding, Coolidge, Hoover, and George W Bush) held office with Uranus in Pisces. “Silent Cal” Coolidge, 30th President (b. 7 / 4 1872) exclaimed, “Biological laws tell us that certain divergent people will not mix or blend (Inferior Races of Asia).” Coolidge preached, “The business of America is business”.

Government and business were in bed together. Illicit affairs wielded temporary and absolute power over tightly woven webs of political, social, and cultural fabric. Plutocrats seduced, then betrayed us for profit. One embodiment of our addiction and dependence on credit and corporations is ‘Citizens United’, who has our permission to make decisions about us for us. Winning through Intimidation works, but Hubris has Karmic Consequences!

Mission accomplished?

George W Bush began his ‘War on Terror’ when Uranus entered Pisces in 2003. By wrecking Iraqi culture and disabling their energy infrastructure, we pilfered and profited from Iraq’s resources. Dick Cheney’s Halliburton bought, sold, and traded Iraq as a proud sponsor of and powerful benefactor from the war in Iraq.

Security for airports and seaports was put in the hands of chosen special interest contractors. Public Health Care was sacrificed on the altars of Health Insurance Czars and Pharmaceutical CEO’s. Social Security, based in faith, truth, and justice, was nearly privatized. Abuse of power, greed, fear, apathy, loss of faith, and control are threats to our good health and the well-being of our constitution, democracy, and planet.

In 1929, loss of faith in our government and economy infected our psyche, catalyzing a devastating stock market crash! In 2008, President George W Bush demonstrated how to create out-of-control federal, domestic, and military spending by giving government bailouts to financial and auto industries and funding nebulous federal mandates like educational reforms that transformed substantial surpluses into huge deficits. Paradoxically, Democrats dominated the Senate and the House from 2007~ 09 during the banking and housing financial scandals.

Before the great Stock Market Crash, Uranus in Pisces transmuted traditional ideologies from thrift and austerity to mass consumerism, addiction, and unobstructed credit. Two out of three Americans had electricity, refrigerators, and washing machines. Henry Ford created green and maroon as well as black cars. Spending on recreation tripled. Mass tastes stimulated and cultivated markets for Rice Krispies, Lender’s Bagels, Mounds Bars, Betty Crocker, Peter Pan Peanut Butter, and many other super marketable products.

Credit and consumerism created the illusion of an easy and convenient life. Uranus in Pisces inspired movie audiences to out attend church audiences. Movie houses, chain stores, and radio advertising proliferated. ‘Modern Romance Magazine’ challenged moral codes. Critics believed consumerism was driving Americans into a soulless existence. Writer Sinclair Lewis highlighted humanity’s illusions and delusions while blaming mass production and consumption for “having created a bloodless, loveless, and standardized world”. “He who dies rich, dies disgraced” Andrew Carnegie.

In 1925, the KKK released 40,000 hooded members to invade Washington DC. Their resurgence targeted African Americans, Immigrants, Catholics, and Jews. New laws reduced the stream of migrants to a trickle while congress hindered immigrants based on quotas of 150,000 new immigrants yearly. The KKK endorsed Donald Trump for President in Nov of 2016. We did nothing but talk, blame, and continue scraping for pennies at the bottom of the barrel. Money talks. Bullshit walks. We need to build more and better bridges, not walls.

Creationism ignored modern science. The opposition between Uranus (science) and Neptune (religion) was clouded by Pisces. Tennessee legislators voted it unlawful for any teacher in a state supported school, “to teach any theory that denies the story of man’s creation as taught in the bible”. Man descending from apes was unacceptable. John Scopes, high school biology teacher, fought for Darwin’s ‘theory of evolution’. Science and truth lost to politics and religion in the “Scopes Monkey Trial”. Denial of Science is even worse now.

I need another yacht…

No rich child left behind. Poor folk are workers, soldiers, and followers. How many yachts and jets do our saviors and persecutors need before they’ll help humanity?

The German Bauhaus School of Architecture’s ‘less is more’ design philosophy influenced architecture and product design on a global scale. Religious culture manipulated school curriculum to cleanse obscenity, promote censorship, and discriminate against race and sexuality in literature and theater. In 1984, Intelligent Design became Creationism. ‘Intelligent Design’ was once about saving materials and money for manufacturers. As an industrial designer, waste was not a problem for me, because clean-up and disposal were someone else’s problem, usually disposed of thoughtlessly, hastily, and carelessly. I depleted more than my share of our planet’s natural resources for ego and fashion. It’s easy to rationalize and compartmentalize choices and actions and ignore consequences. I retired from polluting the planet and became the ‘Guru of Garbage’. Landfills are overflowing with award winning design! Few people realize how much ability each and every one of us has to affect and infect our future with Chronic Spiritual Cancer, which is caused by Humanity’s Lack of Foresight, Consumption, Waste, Greed, Ignorance, Hate, and Fear.

‘Intelligent design’ is not ‘smart design’. Smart designers create useful products and services using sustainable resources, efficient energy production, and fewer pollutants. More waste is recycled or reused in constructive projects that enhance nature and humanity. We must shift our paradigms from lying, denying, and hiding truth, to seeing, understanding, accepting, and embracing reality. Hate can be transformed into love by letting go of fear. The handwriting is on the wall and the time is now!

Common sense is not good sense. Denying science is not ‘intelligent Design’. We interpret fake news and decipher deceptive politics. All news taken in context and by degree is ideologically corrupt, philosophically bankrupt, and spiritually blind on one level or another. ‘It’s not what you do, but what you get away with that matters’.

PRACTICING WHAT THEY’RE PREACHING?

Real darkness is not funny. Pundits parody greed, prejudice, hate, and hypocrisy. Emperors think they know what’s best for the rest of us as they weave naked warps of ‘no love’ with gilded wefts of ‘tough love’. Where are our healthy role models? Being healthier, happier, more loving, and tolerant of ourselves, each other, and world is a mission and mandate that makes good sense. We must choose leaders who have courage, strength, wisdom, and grace to do what’s best for everyone and everything!

Much has happened since 1919. More than a Century has passed. Neptune returned to Pisces April 4, 2011 and will remain until April 1, 2025. Neptune blurs boundaries, distorts vision, creates illusion, and promotes delusion. Pisces embodies physical, mental, and emotional endings that can catalyze new beginnings. The dusk of denial is the dawn of truth. Bad behavior has become pandemic. Healthy behavior is the cure.

If hindsight is 2020, how come attitudes didn’t change. Why must we lose what we value to value what we had? History repeats in its desperate and disparate attempt to teach us to stop learning in hard ways. Neptune in Pisces embodies infinite shades of gray from the Brightest Spiritual White to the Blackest Death. Must we die to be reborn?

In 2008, Pluto entered Capricorn. With help from Uranus in Pisces and Neptune in Aquarius, Pluto began transforming traditional ideologies and beliefs. Humanity needs to focus attention on harnessing and directing sustainable energy, cultivating values over money, refining communications, upgrading infrastructure, improving public and private transportation, providing healthcare for all, encouraging honest relationships, choosing healthy philosophies, practicing bi-partisan politics, having clear purpose, deciding our personal and collective destinies, encouraging creativity, and being more spiritual. Practicing Courage, Strength, Wisdom, and Grace will lead to the Palace of Good Health and Happiness.

2011. Uranus in Aries, Neptune in Pisces, and Pluto in Capricorn, symbolizes greed, wealth, power, and the illusion and delusion of Self Importance. Huge footprints do not mean huge hearts. The pathology of power fosters denial of truth. A sense of futility and apathy nourishes the disillusion of the free will of 99%. Fear and terror poisoned the Kool-Aid and too many naive and unsuspecting folk are mindlessly guzzling it.

EXPELIOSIS!

WARNING!!!

Unhealthy for 99% +

Nonsense trumps good sense. Money trumps values. Religion trumps spirituality. Climate denial trumps science. Health insurance companies trump healthcare. HMO’s, pharmaceutical companies, and medical profiteers trump everyone. Plutocrats trump politicians. Politicians trump circumstances that require habitual filling of partisan vacancies and attention to profits. Privatized prisons trump poor black prisoners. Prison hatcheries trump frantic followers who foster fundamentalist ideologies and favor fanatical behaviors. The human race has become a race against bad shit happening too predictably and often.

Absolute power corrupts! Choose your cause. Make your decisions. Take your actions. When you’re lucky, give back as much as you can. Make real differences! Hubris has taken down every demagogue in history. Karma manifests when outer and inner worlds collide and divide! If 2020 was the best year for ‘Hindsight’, what’s our responsibility now?

Get your LOCK HIM UP ex-Presidential Medal while supplies last!

How can humanity become mentally and emotionally stable? We can send electric cars into space, but can we transform mass transportation, build better bridges, create well planned tunnels, and less walls? What are the best ways to renew our topsoil, clean our water, freshen our air, and make the smartest uses of our energy resources?

Conceive the inconceivable. Healthy intent, well thought out plans, and right use of free will creates huge possibilities and probabilities. As we help ourselves, we help others. Can we plan what to do next to love and protect our personal and planetary health and well-being?

Love, truth, and justice come with moral obligations and ethical responsibilities. Physical and spiritual wealth is best spent planning and laying strong foundations for whole, healthy, and natural structures. Humanity needs guidance and governance from caring and nurturing leaders and managers who love their families, friends, others, and especially Gaia who sustains and nourishes all life.

AQUARIUS & PSYCHE

Aquarius & Psyche

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Personal & Collective Psyche transform as Saturn, Uranus, Neptune, and Pluto change Sun signs and personal relationships. Uranus transits each of twelve signs for seven years. It takes eighty-four years for Uranus to pass through twelve signs.

Uranus surprises, revises, and revolutionizes. Uranus entered Aquarius twice in the 20th Century. 1912 to 1919 brought sudden unexpected political and social upheaval, provocative philosophical & spiritual ideologies, loss of faith in humanity, and lack of trust in ourselves.

1912 ~ “The Unsinkable Titanic” sunk on its maiden voyage… karmic lesson in Hubris

1913 ~ Tornadoes & Floods devastated Middle America. 3,000 dead + $100,000,000 in damages… a painful and expensive lesson in preparedness

1914 ~ World War I ~ Greed, Hatred, Fear, and Terror levied a heavy toll on humanity

1915 ~ Jan. 25… Sun, Uranus, Mercury, Jupiter, and Lunar North Node, energized by Uranus and powered by Aquarius. Alexander Graham Bell began international mass communications through the first transcontinental phone call made Jan 25th, 1915. A powerful concept’s time had come. The Dark Side: German submarine torpedoed the British Ocean Liner Lusitania

1916 ~ What kind of wall would have prevented Pancho Villa, Mexican revolutionary, from invading the USA? President Wilson retaliated by sending 6,000 troops into Mexico.

Official Gazette of London published the names of 80 United States firms suspected of trading with Germany. Prescott Bush (banker) was on the list.

1917 ~ USA declared war on Germany. Hitler’s enemies became our allies. Hatred & Bigotry was bountiful, catalyzing the worst race riot in American history in Illinois.

Congress amended laws that prohibited beer, wine, and liquor from being profitable

1918 ~ Spanish Flu was the worst pandemic since the Bubonic Plague that wiped out one quarter of Europe’s population in the 14th century. Daylight Savings Time was born.

1919 ~ Prohibition was ratified as the 18th amendment to our constitution. Congress failed to ratify the Treaty of Versailles. President Wilson disagreed and went on public tour to fight the decision. He died trying.

Uranus transited Aquarius again in 1996. The final leg of his journey marked the fall of the World Trade Centers. Had we chosen faith, love, and brotherhood over fear, selfishness, and convenience, we’d be building bridges instead of walls!

Neptune was in Aquarius from Nov 27, 1998, to Apr 4, 2011. Neptune eroticized and romanticized male vanity and virility. ‘Getting it up’ got popular when Pfizer introduced Viagra in 1998.

The stock market created a new form of gambling addiction called “internet day trading” where the present is more profitable than the future. DVDs were the fastest growing consumer electronics product in history. Bribes and drugs tarnished the Olympic Games. Innocence and civil liberties were transformed as our ideals, illusions, and delusions about private and social security and stability dissolved. What we think and how we feel about our past, present, and future is what matters most in the eternal here and now.

Neptune impelled illusion & fantasy to find reality when body piercing & tattoos became popular. President Clinton’s first political act of 1996 was to sign a welfare reform bill that made life harder for poor people. The downtrodden were deceived, divided, and demoralized by the powers that be. Madeline Albright became the first female Secretary of State. Ellen DeGeneres was the first gay star on an ABC sitcom. Taiwan’s first democratic election was held. Four major plane crashes happened.

Neptune rules vision, illusion, delusion, and confusion. In 1998, Neptune in Aquarius represented a House of Representatives who impeached Bill Clinton for giving “perjurious false and misleading” testimony in front of a grand jury. Bill’s Hands, Sun, Mercury, Saturn, and Pluto are ruled by LEO. Rest assured, Hillary mercilessly spanked Bill’s sorry butt after he got caught being careless and cocky. In Leo of 2005, the IRA announced an end to its armed campaign and committed to complete decommissioning of all its weapons. Catholic and Protestant believers, practitioners, and clergymen voted for peace in Ireland.

Outer planets rule the electronic (Uranus) ether (Neptune). The US government and twenty state attorney generals charged Microsoft with anti-trust practices for dominating the Internet access market. Bill Gates has a Scorpio Sun, Venus, and Saturn, with Leo hands. Bill fantasizes about being god, but has much to hide and too many secrets not to be humble. Bill is a god in the underworld.

Andrew Carnegie said, “He who dies rich, dies disgraced.” Imagine having enough power to make gigantic differences for all of humanity and our planet and not do anything of value? What’s the ethical, moral, and spiritual responsibility for knowing the difference? Many people give more time and money to charity than Bill Gates compared to their available time & money.

Neptune entered Pisces in 2012. 1/10 of 1% afflicted and infected the other 99.9% with physical, mental, emotional, ideological, psychological, philosophical, and spiritual pathogens and disease. Our illusions, delusions, and deceptions of becoming old, poor, sick, disabled, and/or unable to afford bad shit happening were dissolving. Individual and collective hatred, fear, and terror prevent us from transmuting our inequities into equities. We must learn to see clearly and take full responsibility for our behavior, values, thinking, feelings, health, relationships, creativity, philosophy, purpose, hopes, desires, fears, and spirituality.

Whether

Look / See ~ Listen / Hear

Haves rule. Neptune in Pisces symbolizes billions of individuals around the world seeking security, stability, and spiritual answers. Neptune is also revealing despair, fear, and terror. Historians will describe the 21st Century as an era of false prophets and false profits. Indentured folks are at the bottom of the barrel scraping for pennies. Plutocrats skim the cream as they bribe and extort the partisan help who permit them to deplete, pollute, and poison our planet, manage our healthcare, regulate our welfare, gamble with our social security, control our pensions, and manage our pretensions. The middle and lower classes are pawns, collateral damage, in a crooked game of chess. If freedom and slavery are white and black, what shades of gray are you?

Pluto enters Aquarius on March 23, 2023, and leaves in 2044. Pluto will expose our dirty little secret agendas and realign humanity’s ideals, hopes, and dreams. Pluto could also hammer the last rusty nail in the impatiently awaiting coffin of humanity’s sanity. It’s up to us…

The human race has become a race against bad shit happening. Never have so few been permitted to influence, manipulate, and control so many.

“The lips of wisdom are closed, except to the ears of understanding.”

Hermes

All is in THE ALL” “THE ALL is in All”

To him who truly understands this truth hath come great knowledge.

Hermes was the father of the ‘Cell Phone’. Everything is made of cells. Hermes taught that the brain is our hardware whose function is to connect inner with outer cells and fine tune our links.

In ancient Egypt, Hermes was the mystic teacher of Abraham. Hermes reputedly lived to be 350 years old in the flesh as a real person. @ 75, I’m ready to upgrade my operating system from Peter Pan (adolescence) to Hermes (adulthood). Joanna, my ‘Wendy’ (‘Artemis’), calls me “a piece of work in progress”. She says I’m still in my first childhood. Joanna has an Aries Sun with Taurus rising. I call her “RamBull”. Our friends remind us that “We deserve each other!”

“As Above, So Below” Hermes

Capricorn & Psyche

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Zodiacal sign changes and geometric relationships between outer planets catalyze massive personal and collective transformations of psyche. Uranus, Neptune, and Pluto transited Capricorn in the 20th Century. Paradigms for political institutions and social structures shifted. Uranus in Capricorn revolutionized world relations, politics, religion, and business from 1989 to 1996. The Iron Curtain and Berlin Wall were ripped down. Germany was reunited on Libra 3, 1990. Sociopolitical demarcations between East and West vanished. The Soviet Union disintegrated into fifteen republics in 1991. The Americans with Disabilities Act prohibited discriminating against disabled people. We applied rules, regulations, reforms, and reformations, but continued the trumped-up patriotism, pious philosophies, partisan social discrimination, and fabricated fears.

With Neptune in Capricorn in 1985, NASA’s Voyager space probe recorded Uranus orbiting the outer limits of our solar system. In 2018 with Saturn (government) and Pluto (Power Elite) in Capricorn, Uranus (sudden changes in values and money) in Taurus, and Neptune (vision, illusion, and delusion) in Pisces, Donald Trump announced a 6th branch of our military services that organized, trained, and equipped space forces to protect the USA and allied interests in space and provide space capabilities to the joint force.

Politics in outer space is a waste of time and money. One better idea is to distribute available funds wisely in the here and now. Choose healthy ideas, plans, and actions for all living things. It’s time to address the fundamental conflicts, issues, and beliefs in our society such as ‘Money vs Values’, ‘Money & Morality’, and ‘Haves vs Have~nots’. Religion is losing its purpose for humanity as spirituality becomes more scarce.

Nelson Mandela was released after 27 years behind bars. Anti-Apartheid movements galvanized across the globe in 1990. Jean Bertrand Aristide, penniless radical priest, became Haiti’s first freely elected president. Ten months later, armed rebels seized control of his government and ousted him for ‘meddling in army affairs’. After Asylum in the USA, Aristide returned to office in 1994 with 20,000 American troops. Operation Desert Storm liberated Kuwait from Iraqi invaders. Bosnia declared independence from Yugoslavia, resulting in a religious civil war that pitted Serbs and Croats against Muslims. Genocide in Yemen, Syria, Sudan, and Somalia promoted fear, prejudice, and hatred across the globe! OY!

Johnny Carson retired after 30 years of hosting the ‘Tonite Show’ in May 1992. Representatives from over 100 countries met in Rio de Janeiro /June to figure out how to save the earth. It became obvious to all that common sense needed good sense because too many of us are out of our conscious minds and hearts!

My faces on original art & signature

November 1993, thirteen years after Brady was shot and paralyzed, the Brady Bill for gun control was finally signed into law. Republican leaders continued worshipping greed, coveting power, ignoring human values, abusing planetary well-being, and abandoning the future of our world. Too many lethal weapons of mass destruction are still being sold to too many psychotic males who will eventually use them for mass shootings in malls, schools, and churches.

In October 1995, the USA and UN brokered a prickly cease-fire to end ethnic cleansing. PLO leader Yassar Arafat shook hands with Israeli Prime Minister Yitzhak Rabin to end hatred. The Irish Republican Army agreed to lay down its arms in exchange for a role in Northern Ireland’s political future. Smoking was banned in restaurants in New York City. More women began smoking cigars.

Neptune began its journey through Capricorn in 1984. Clear lines between chemical industries and moral responsibilities dissolved. A gas leak from a Union Carbide plant in India killed over 3,000 people. British scientists pinpointed a hole in the earth’s ozone layer. In 1987, having seen the dark handwriting on the walls, fifty-three nations signed a treaty pledging to reduce the number of CFCs in our atmosphere. November 1996, 55 parties signed the Paris Accord, agreeing to save the climate. 194 countries, including the European Union, have agreed to work on climate change. Businessmen, Politicians, and Priests have to agree to agree to their degree of greed!

Expect the unexpected. Suspect the unsuspected. Correct the uncorrected.

Forever toxic! The most Neptune accident in history occurred at Chernobyl in April 1986. Thirty-one people were killed instantly. 40,000 were later diagnosed with Cancer from too much exposure to nuclear radiation. In March 1989, the Exxon Valdez shipwreck became the worst oil spill in history, contaminating hundreds of miles of Alaska shoreline, and killing tens of thousands of innocent creatures. It’s time to correct and deselect fossil fuels and environmental degradation. Select clean energy, sustainability, nature, and nurture.

Ignore science? Everyone knows ‘Roundup’ is carcinogenic. Monsanto, creator of Agent Orange, PCBs, DDTs, and Dioxins, launched “Round-up Ready” GMO soybeans in 1994, approved by the FDA. ‘Frankenfood’ was born. Environmental activists fought while FDA folly was parodied on late night TV. Mad Cow disease appeared in the UK in 1996. A slim line between science fiction and reality was crossed when the first sheep was cloned in Scotland in 1997. The FDA approved a drug called AZT, designed to treat AIDS. El Nino was blamed for bizarre weather conditions 1997~1998.

Neptune transformed illusions of fatherhood. Bill Cosby was most popular father in 1984. Bill wasn’t practicing what he was preaching. He had zero awareness of how Karma would reward him when Saturn would return to Scorpio in 2014. Bill was ridiculed by hordes of ex-fans when ‘me too’ appeared on his doorstep. With Saturn in Capricorn in 2018, Bill was thrown into state prison for drugging and sexually assaulting a variety of women.

Racial bigots, Archie Bunker, and Homer Simpson were popular patriarchal parodies. ‘Married with Children’ flaunted twisted fantasies of fatherhood. Disney studios produced the ultimate LEO father and son story, ‘Lion King’. Murphy Brown revealed her Animus to a Collective Psyche’s repressed and vulnerable Anima. She encouraged all females not to give away their power. Sadly, we’re still choosing to appoint rapists and elect pussy grabbers to leadership roles in public office, commerce, and society.

Ivan Boesky preached virtuosity and honesty while practicing insider trading. Frenzied mergers, acquisitions, and takeovers began in 1980, destabilizing financial institutions. General Electric purchased media giants NBC and RCA. Bank of Credit and Commerce International (BCCI) collapsed. Regulators from 69 countries seized assets and charged officers who hid substantial losses from investors. Congress closed the House of Representatives Bank in the wake of scandal.

On Jan 6, 2021, Sun and Mercury conjunct Pluto in Capricorn, Donald Trump incited an insurrection on our Capitol that catalyzed the Jan 6 committee and the beginning of the end for CHUMPENOMICS!

Neptune dissolves political and financial structures. Mikhail Gorbachev reformed controls to keep the Soviet Union together. Growing concerns over growing federal deficit catalyzed the Gramm-Rudman-Hollings Act in 1974 to balance the budget and stabilize the deficit. Congress failed to control its spending rather than assume the massive mandatory cuts specified.

It was transformed in 1990 to the Budget Enforcement Act. As Reagan deficits soared to two trillion dollars (2X 1981), Reagan taxed Social Security to gather more from the poor and middle class. Black Monday crashed the stock market with unexpected steeply dropping stock prices. Texaco filed the largest bankruptcy in history. National deficits grew greater as the middle class grew smaller and poorer. Haves have. Have-nots have not! Time for HAVES to share generously, practically, and reasonably with all!

Pluto corrupts. Money without morality is bankrupt. Religion without Spirituality is blind. The top 1/10th of 1% are above the law and beyond scrutiny. The other 99.9% are clueless what to do with laws or themselves. Covetous capitalists, deceptive business practices, devious plans, and dark conspiracies dwell in Pluto’s domain. Partisan politics, greed, and hypocrisy must be confronted and transmuted into healthy behaviors, values, thinking, feelings, use of will power, relationships, creativity, philosophy, purpose, dreams, fears, and spirituality.

Expecto Patronum”

Donaldemort, a gluttonous grifter, science denier, and squanderer of natural resources rules Dementors who grift our pocketbooks, poison our principles, and pollute our planet’s body, respiratory, and circulatory systems. They punish and abuse us physically, and try to incapacitate and imprison our minds & psyches.

Nostradamus predicted Pluto in Capricorn would destabilize major financial structures. Bubbles created by illusions like social security and financial stability would burst. Congress would become infected with jealousy, lies, and greed!

Have we prepared for erratic interest rates and inflation? Can we reform our broken social systems? What happens in 2025 when the Federal Reserve Bank, founded Dec. 23, 1913 (Capricorn) destabilizes as transiting Neptune in Aries squares our Fed’s natal Sun Pluto opposition? Can we figure out what that means or might or could mean ahead of time?

If Hindsight truly is 2020, looking backward to 12/23/2022 finds Sun, Moon, Mercury, Venus and Pluto transiting through Capricorn. It’s time to reveal faulty foundations, shaky structures, and horrible habits. Sun, Moon, Mercury, and Venus conjunct Pluto in Capricorn then pass him. It’s time to balance personal and collective heads and hearts. Every thought, choice, and action has consequences. The human race has become a race against bad shit happening.

Forward to 1/6/2023. Full moon in Cancer. Time to let go of fear and hatred and transmute our thoughts, choices, and actions for ourselves, others, and our planet. It’s a perfect time to choose supportive, caring, and nurturing foundations and structures for natural and human systems and cultures.

We must reuse, recycle, and recreate our world by revolutionizing our infrastructure and energy needs and nourishing ourselves and our environment. Fossil fuels can be useful as sustainable products and not squandered on herds of racehorses under our hoods.

Recycling, Reusing, and Reducing need to be reinforced on a massive scale to become practical and cost effective. We need to build bridges instead of walls, repair highways, and design and implement healthy solutions to cost effective public transportation systems that offer comfort, accessibility, and affordability for all.

The Declaration of Independence was signed July 4, 1776. Some astrologers dispute whether Gemini or Sagittarius is rising. Regardless, natal Sun, Jupiter, Venus, and Mercury are in Cancer. Transiting Pluto in Capricorn has returned to his natal position to transform our human and planetary mythology into a new reality for everyone and everything. If Gemini is rising, it’s not a great time for too many smug short-sighted children to take what’s valuable for granted. As Pluto in Capricorn reaches into our cell phones, computers, e-devices, minds, hearts, and souls, he influences more than elections. Pluto can help our nation heal or he can cause a loss of status as a positive role model for the world!

God rules. Laws enforce. Reputation regulates!

Must we lose what we value to learn to truly value it?

New York City’s charter was signed on January 1 1898 at 12:01 am. On Xmas 2013, transiting Pluto, Sun, and Mercury in Capricorn were conjunct New York City’s natal Sun. Physical, financial, and social infrastructures, transportation, and politics were transformed. Gov. Andrew Cuomo announced sweeping new gun control. Newtown marked one year since the Sandy Hook shootings. The July 13 verdict of Trayvon Martin sparked heated discussion about race relations and garnered strong reactions from people across the country. A Metro-North train derailed, killing 4. Anthony Weiner’s weiner was caught in another sexting scandal. New York City Public Advocate Bill De Blasio defeated former MTA chairman Joe Lhota in a race for mayor with a landslide win on Nov. 5. Bill De Blasio championed the middle class, raising salaries for city workers, supporting minimum wage, implementing universal pre-K, and making affordable housing available.

Worldwide challenges included ice and snow storms, hurricanes, tornadoes, tsunamis, earthquakes, droughts, wildfires, and other unnatural anomalies created by human environmental abuse. Capricorn rises in the USSR constitution. Saturn and Pluto promise political and economic upheaval. Putin embodies Pluto in his quest to destroy, conquer, and rape the Ukrainian spirit. In the final analysis, Pluto teaches where responsibility begins and accountability ends. The seduction turns Pluto on, but the betrayal gets him off! Bottom lines don’t justify the means.

Best thing ve can do for no longer useful idiots is not be one of ‘em!