Story Time: Three Little Pigs and their Thumbs

Once there were three little pigs that were brothers. Wilbur had tiny thumbs, Billy had medium size thumbs, and William had large thumbs.

Wilbur’s tiny thumbs were very supple. The top phalange flexed back easily at the first joint. He was sweet and kind, a real romantic, but with those conical tips, lived in a world of his own ideal fantasies. Wilbur dreamed of having a beautiful home, riches, and true love, but he didn’t understand the importance of making commitments, having determination, or being loyal. He didn’t have a clue how to make his dreams come true. He played megamillions, hoping to solve all of his problems at once. When a fellow pig was down on his luck, Wilbur would give him what little resources he had, then run to his larger thumbed brothers and ask for a handout. He’d offer his latest poem or sing them a song, hoping to engage their sympathy. Sometimes Billy and William would get so frustrated, that they’d deny Wilbur’s requests. He’d brood and tell strangers of the unfairness of his brothers and of the world in general. Putting it mildly, this little pig was unmotivated and unassertive and the world is not particularly kind to little pigs with these qualities. In school, Wilbur enjoyed art and music, but performed poorly in academics. It’s not that he wasn’t smart, but he didn’t apply himself to anything. Other pigs of questionable character easily led Wilbur around. He was constantly falling in love, building elaborate romantic fantasies in his imagination, but he was so shy that the object of his desire never even knew he existed. If only Wilbur’s parents had known about thumbs. They could have helped Wilbur strengthen his thumb by offering more genuine encouragement and helpful support to strengthen his will, instead of criticizing and comparing him to his larger thumbed brothers.  With regard to that house of straw, his brothers built it for him. They had hoped that he wouldn’t end up on their doorsteps, but little thumbed pigs are especially vulnerable to big bad wolves and you know the rest of that story.

Unlike his tiny thumbed brother, Billy had medium sized; medium set column-like thumbs. He was practical, reliable, and responsible. His square fingertips on flexible (not supple, not stiff) fingers, symbolized Billy’s need to be orderly and systematic. He was a practical problem solver, planning eventually to go out and get a job working for someone else. Billy did well enough in school, but he was easily satisfied with not asking enough of himself. Billy learned a trade and became a wood worker. That’s why Billy built his house from sticks. He wanted logs, but couldn’t afford them, so he decided he would build log additions on as time went on.

As a loyal friend, Billy attracted other practical and responsible friends. Billy maintained a small savings account and had some credit card debt, but always made payments on time. Annoyed by his small thumbed brother’s irresponsible attitude, Billy gave Wilbur handouts while lecturing him on taking responsibility for his future. Billy had a sowfriend whom he intended to marry, but were waiting until their nest egg was more substantial. What a shame the wolf blew Billy’s house down, but rest assured this little piggie started over, building his home more substantially the next time.

Everyone thought William (big thumbed brother) was the luckiest pig. He was lucky to have such strong thumbs. They were broad, strong, resilient, low set, and had spatulate tips. William was ambitious and hard working. He was practical like Billy, but he was also independent and very inventive. Always knowing he was going to work for himself, William excelled both academically and athletically. He became president of the student council. All the sows adored him, but William had his eye on the captain of the cheerleading team. They dated for a few months and then got married. When William graduated from high school, he went straight into business school. His MBA completed, this little piggie went to market with his own general contracting business. While William hired Billy occasionally as a carpenter, he never offered him a full time job because he didn’t want Billy to become dependent on him. Wilbur frequently showed up for handouts. William was non-judgmental and generous, but always asked Wilbur to help move something heavy, wash the car, or clean the house. This worked much better than a lecture to keep handouts to a minimum. The wolf was no match for this determined little pig who knew that his well-built house could withstand a hurricane.

By the way, Big Bad the Wolf (Scorpio) had large, high-set clubbed thumbs. These thumbs were hereditary and symbolized a family history of murdering little pigs. Big Bad was obstinate and known for having explosive reactions in difficult situations. Fortunately for the large thumbed pig, the wolf was narrow-minded, unlike his cousin, Clever Fox with his slim waisted paddle-like thumbs. Big Bad hyperventilated, passed out, and died of a head injury  while trying to blow down William’s reinforced concrete block wall.